Why Germany
by Yanagi-wa
Summary: Relena has had it, she needs a vacation badly. They go to Germany. Fourth in the Corrupting Relena Arc


Title: Why Germany?

Author: Yanagi

Archive: Humor, Adventure

Rating: PG for violence

Warnings: none

Spoilers: None

Notes: Fourth in Corrupting Relena series. In this story, as in all my stories if someone is swearing in English, they are speaking English, or another language. If they are swearing in some other language, that is their native language and they are swearing in it, i.e. Heero says 'Shimatta, I hate it when you act like a Baka.' He's speaking English. Heero says 'Damnit, I hate it when you act like a fool'. He's speaking either Japanese or English. If it's important, I'll make sure you know which language it is.

I've coopted Luxembourg as the approximate location of Sanq. Remember this is several centuries in the future. Borders are sure to have changed especially in war torn areas.

Special thanks to Enna Namo for all her help with anything German. Huggles, pocky, and thanks beyond measure.

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The noise was nothing much, just a scuffling noise coming from the nearby Residence.

Duo looked at Heero and snarled 'Relena.' They took off at a run.

The tiny noise had alerted them that someone might be sneaking around Relena's balcony.

They both climbed up the ivy need that stripped off on to the balcony and peeked in at the french doors.

Relena was enthusiastically ripping her date book to confetti uttering little grunts at the same time. After tossing the remains of the book into the trash she whirled around and snarled.

"If you two aren't either in or out in less than a second, I'll . . ."

Then she started to cry, little sniffling sobs accompanied by crystalline tears. One thing that could be said about Relena was she cried pretty. No red nose or eyes for her. But her nose did run.

Duo watched as Heero took Relena in his arms and settled her against his shoulder. While he tried to comfort her Duo absently explored the room, old habits die hard and the last time he'd been in here he'd been too busy to look around.

Now he inspected the room and decided that Relena was entirely too fond of pink. Everything in the room was some shade of pink or ivory. Even her computer. Computer? What?

Duo settled himself in front of the computer and eyed the screen in disgust, no wonder Relena was upset. He was going to kill her dresser whennot ifwhen he got his hands on her.

"Heero, she even put up my locket for auction. The one you gave me for Christmas. I hate that. I can't do this. . . I wanna . . ." Relena dissolved into tears again and Heero could only pat her on the shoulder and rock her.

Duo tapped at the key board for a moment and turned to Heero. "We got that woman on some nasty charges. I froze her account and all unshipped sale items. I messaged Fraud Division and they're going to handle it from here on out. . . Relly, your locket is safe. You'll get it back in about a week. "

"Good. I want . . . I don't. . . I'm tiiiiiirrrrrrred." Relena's little wail made Heero wince slightly. It was too reminiscent of a certain wail of, well, you know.

Duo sighed, he'd seen this coming for a while now. Relena was over worked, under payed and under . . .played. To clean the phrase up to fit Relena. She didn't have enough time to herself. She was finding out that she couldn't do it all herself and she couldn't trust one of the people she should have been able to trust the most.

"I'm going to hire you a new dresser and get you a social secretary. All from Preventers they'll be reliable, good at their jobs, no more of this selling your clothes to collectors or six minute drives from the zoo to mid town." Heero's head reared like a cobras at that particular piece of intel "and they can provide additional protection."

Heero cuddled Relena absently. "Where's Phargan?"

"He retired last year. I see him religiously every other Sunday at 2:00 pm when I'm in town. I miss him. He kept everything going so well. You mean you didn't miss him?"

"He's not my concern. He's no threat to your security, so I never noticed."

Duo rolled his eyes, mission oriented Heero had never noticed when one of the central figures of Relena's life retired. "Figures, Yuy, you are such a fuck up some times."

"Watch your mouth, Maxwell" Heero stood up putting Relena on her feet.

"Fuck watching his damn mouth. Yuy, I'm damn sick and fucking tired of all this mealy mouthed dancing around the . . .piss on it. I swear if I don't have some fun soon I'm gonna turn into a frigid bitch. I want to . . ." Relena kicked the nearest item which turned out to be the bed. Heero snatched her off her feet and plunked her down on it with a determined look on his face.

"Maxwell, you've got to watch your mouth around her. Look how she's talking. She never used to talk like that. Don't kick things bare footed, Relena."

"So, she's got a sewer mouth when she's angry. Look at what she's swearing about, not at the swearing. That dresser of her's has sold a bunch of her stuff on line. Even that little locket you gave her for Christmas. She hasn't taken it off but a few times since you gave it to her. She's been robbed and betrayed. You call Une. Get her started on finding her proper support personnel and I'll see want I can do about. . ."

Relena screamed. Duo nearly jumped out of his skin and Heero had his pistol out before he realized that she was kneeling in the middle of her bed moaning, "Shut up! shut up! fucking just shut the hell up."

Duo crawled into the bed with her and pulled her against his chest, hugging and cuddling her until she stopped crying again.

"Relly, Relly . It'll be ok. I'll fix what Heero can't . Just tell me what you want and we'll get it for you."

Relena sniffled wetly and Duo grimaced.

"Yuck! Heero, get Relly some tissues. I'm all wet."

"I'm sorry, Duo. You just don't . . ."

"Relly, I can stand tears. Wet; I don't mind. But even Relena snot is just grosse. Blow your nose. It's running; and don't tell me ladies don't get runny noses."

"I'm sorry, Duo. I just don't think I can stand much more. I need a vacation in the worst way, but you know how things like that usually turn out. I can't get away from people wanting my attention for their own pork belly."

Heero watched, confused, as Duo comforted Relena and made faces at him, he finally handed Duo a handful of tissues and went to look at the computer screen. He didn't like what he saw any better than Duo had. There on the screen, was a listing of Relena 'collectables' which included the cap Duo had given her, her locket, several pieces of clothing and half a dozen pairs of shoes.

Duo murmured softly "Some vacation, huh? I remember seeing it on vid. You never even got to the beach . . . had to hole up in your room til you could get a flight back."

"Yes. It just sucked so big time. Duo, all I want is to be a normal girl once in a while. I wanna. . "

Heero grumbled into the phone arranging for the investigation of her dresser and recovery of everything possible. Then he turned to Relena to outline his arrangements and saw Relena cuddled up to Duo's chest, tears trickling down her cheeks. Duo had his arms around her and was wiping at her face with tissues and making crooning noises. If he'd been the jealous type, he'd have had a twinge, if Relena was a guy.

Duo suddenly dumped Relena on her back causing her to squeal. He started rummaging around in her closet, tossing things out onto the floor. After several items of clothing flew through the air, a small backpack followed to land on top of everything else.

"Here, I don't handle ladies undies. Get packed. Don't take a mountain of makeup and stuff. Where's your shampoo and . . . here. Pack . . . quick . . . hurry. The only reason we don't have a shit load of guards in here right now is Heero called in and told them we were on the scene."

Heero, knowing his partner, just started gathering up shampoo and a few other toiletries that he knew Relena hated to be without. He handed them to Duo who stuffed them into the backpack

"How are we going to get out of here without some one reporting to the media freaks"

"Heero! Be real. We're ex-terrorists. If we can't sneak one girl out of this sieve, I'm buying a walker."

Relena squealed again. "A vacation that I can really enjoy. Oh. My. God. Here give me that. I need these, and this, and that . . . oh, and those. And shoes and. . . how are we going to get out of here?" Relena's shoulders slumped.

Heero grinned at her. "You do the wall today?"

"Of course I did. I like rock climbing. But all I ever get to do is that damn wall." Relena perked up all of a sudden, then she got a positively evil look on her face.

"Duo hurry up. Come on. I've got everything I need and the pack doesn't weigh a ton. What are you doing?"

Duo grinned. He'd been telling the head of security what was going on so that he wouldn't have a panic attack and call out a search party.

Relena started giggling albeit a little wetly. "How are we going to get out of here with out alerting the stalkerattizi?"

"We're going out the same way Duo and I came in. Down the wall."

Relena looked a little doubtful. She didn't think she could get down the wall with her pack. Duo shouldered it and snickered She smirked back and went to the french doors.

"That ivy is my friend, isn't it? Hang on while I change."

"Ok, here. I picked out what you'll need." Duo handed Relena a pile of black clothing with a pair of dark sneakers on top.

Relena retreated to the bathroom and changed in such a short time that Heero actually made an expression. Sort of. He managed to look surprised.

"What? It's a t-shirt, jeans and a pair of sneakers. No make up, and it doesn't matter if I'm 'together' or not. You can't mess up this kind of outfit. But Duo, it's kind of warm for long sleeves. Isn't it?"

Duo indicated the long sleeved shirts he and Heero were wearing. "Long sleeves hide pale skin. Come on. If we're going to get out of here before that security idiot gets the heebee-jeebee's, we better scoot. You get scared or need help just keep it down, ok?"

Heero blinked and realized that they were in the middle of sneaking Relena Peacecraft out of the Residence and taking her he had no idea where. In the middle of May. What the hell have I gotten myself into?.

"You have to do something with her. She sticks out like a sore thumb."

"Ok. little girl lost? college pretty? Goth?"

Heero eyed Relena, who just stood in the middle of the floor with a puzzled look on her face. He walked around her and touched her hair.

"We can't cut this. But she needs to look different. Very different. Do something with it, and her make up. She. . . damnit Duo, you know what I mean."

"Yeah. Gotcha in one, Pardner. Relena, just put yourself in my hands. I'll fix you up in a jiff."

Relena goggled at Heero. Cut her hair? Not a chance in hell! She slapped at his hand and made a snarling sound.

Heero smirked at her and snatched his hand back before she could slap it. "No cutting! We both know better than that, but something has to be done. You look too much like you."

"Well, who the hell am I supposed to look like, if not myself? I mean . . . well . . . I don't know what I mean."

Duo picked up a pair of scissors and smiled. "Trust me. I need to cut your bangs a little. A very little." Relena reluctantly nodded and sat in front of her dressing table, facing the mirror. She intended to keep a very close eye on him.

After trimming Relena's bangs into a more feathered cut and pulling the rest into a high pony tail, Duo turned to her make up.

"This foundation is too pale for you. I've been wondering why you wear it when you've got a lot better matches. What's the deal? . . . Here throw some of this shit away. It's the wrong color for you. Geeze! Relena, you've got better taste than this. Where did this shit come from?"

"My dresser brought it. I tried it out and didn't like it, so I just pitched it into a drawer. She said she was going to clean it out tomo. . .Oh my God! . . . that bitch! She bought the wrong colors knowing I wouldn't wear it. She was going to sell it for collectibles. Damn her. Don't throw it in the trash."

Duo eyed her for a second. "There's an incinerator down the hall. Heero toss all this in there, will you?"

Heero just gathered the discarded makeup into a towel and went to do as he was asked, he would have argued about the whole scheme, except Relena looked so . . .strained She really looked like she was about to snap in two.

When he got back, it was to see a young girl in black t-shirt, jeans and grey sneakers with a dark green bandana tied over her bright hair. If you looked close enough, you might think she resembled Relena Peacecraft a little. He couldn't help smiling

"Oh geeze!" Relena clutched at her chest."Heero Yuy smiled! Be still, my heart! What do you think? And why does Duo know so much about makeup and stuff?"

Heero suddenly jumped Duo and twisted his arms behind his back, pinning him while he squirmed and struggled.

"NO! Don't you dare. Yuy, if you tell. I'll . . . You." Duo sputtered and struggled while Relena watched wide eyed and startled. "Lemme go. Damnit. Yuy, you . . " Duo suddenly stopped as Heero gripped his chin and kissed him ruthlessly into silence. "Yuy, that's not fair. You know I can't resist when you do that. I mmmmmm"

Heero spend a few precious moments making sure Duo didn't protest anymore. Then he smirked at Relena.

"Come on. We need to get out of here now or we aren't going to make it. I'll tell you all about it later. I promise. Move out-now."

They scrambled down the outside wall of the Residence rather more quickly than Heero had thought they would. He watched Relena for any sigh that she was in trouble, but in fact, she was as good as Duo, which meant that she was almost as good as he was. He had never actually watched her climb the wall at HQ.

They faded into the bushes, slipped away from the Residence and into the night. Relena hadn't needed much help climbing the outer wall. In fact she saw the only guard first. She had hissed softly, they all froze and waited until the perimeter guard clomped by. Heero decided to put Duo to checking the security around the Residence as soon as they got back.

Half an hour later they were at their apartment packing their own backpacks, which didn't take long, as they had packs that stayed ready to be snatched up at a moments notice.

"She needs ID. We're ok. We can go as ourselves. I just put in for two weeks vacation. You know Une has been after us to take some for months now. Yuy, you've got six months of combined over time, leave with pay, and vacation. Une is having kittens, and accounting is right behind her.

"Oh yeah, like I'm so bad. Did you look at your accumulated leave?"

"Yeah. I used up four sick days."

Relena just sat on the couch, looking back and forth like at a tennis match, with a slight smile on her face.

"Oh! I can't stand it! Four whole sick days in . . . what . . . three years?"

"Something like that."

Relena couldn't help it. She had to ask. "Excuse me. But what about when you're . . . er . . . " she stalled out wondering how to ask her question without bringing up bad memories.

"Wounded doesn't come out of sick days. That's job related injuries and is covered under workmans comp."

Heero bopped Duo on the back of the head.

"That's not what she was asking . . . she's too . . ."

"What the fuck? Delicate? Girlfriend has nerves of steel and that's exactly what she wanted to know."

"That s right, Yuy. Get over the thought that I'm some kind of squeamish, squealing, feather head. I grew up. Maybe not as soon as I should have, but I did. So get over it."

Heero blinked for a second, he was getting his eyes opened quickly. He didn't think all the changes were for the better, but then, what did he really know about how a princess/queen; whatever, should act. He did know that she was on the razor's edge and they were the only ones willing or able to pull her back.

"Ok, ok. I'm sorry. Let's see about getting her some ID and get on the move. If this is going to work, we're going to have to keep under the 'radar' and keep moving. We need to find a safe-house . . . un . . . " Heero started laughing. All it took was one thing and he and Duo were back in soldier mode.

Duo laughed too. One, the look on Relena's face as Heero laughed was worth money; and two, the fact that Heero was laughing meant that he was getting into the idea that they were really taking Relena on a vacation. But where?

"Ok, where do you want to go? We need to keep it to ground transport so that we don't leave too much of a trail. We need a destination that . . ."

"Germany! I want to go to Germany . . . to the Maifest. Beer gardens. We could sleep in the youth hostels. They don't pay that much attention to who's there. I mean . . ."

Relena trickled off at the looks on Heero and Duo's faces. Heero looked stunned and Duo had a look of such unholy glee that she though his face might split.

"Relena, that's soo . . . exactly . . ." Duo turned to Heero, "and you. Don't say a thing. It's perfect. The border with Germany is close, youth hostels are the perfect place to hide three people our age, and they're safe. Germans wouldn't allow anything less. And Maifest is fun. Food, drink. We could go see eagles and look for . . . what is it? Some flower or other. With some rock climbing thrown in. Getting across won't be too much trouble, we can look like students on spring break, or young professionals on vacation. Credentials aren't that hard to forge. We'll be on our way in . . . two hours."

Relena nibbled at her lip. She didn't want to get anyone in trouble and forging credentials could get Duo in a lot of trouble. She didn't hear him call Une for permission, which she granted after a quick explanation.

Relena leaned over Duos shoulder and watched as he typed their information into a form already in his computer.

"Duo, you could get in a lot of trouble doing that. If you get caught forging credentials for personal reasons . . . well, I don't like to think of you in that kind of a mess."

Heero wandered in with a camera and fiddled with it for a minute, then snapped a picture, mumbled and showed it to Duo who said 'have her take off the bandana." which she did. He took several more pictures and Duo finally found one that was acceptable, connected the camera to the computer and down loaded it. He mouse clicked, mumbled, poked a key or two and turned to the printer, extracted a sheet of paper and handed it to Heero.

Heero took out a pair of long sheers, cut the paper into two pieces, turned to a laminater and did mysterious things to it. When he was done, he had an ID card that declared Regina Craft to be a graduate student in poly sci. and old enough to drink (barely). The fake address was Sanq U. Dormitory #2. With a smeared room number. The other paper was carefully glued into a cardboard cover.

This was a universal passport. The ancient passport needed stamps and verifications, the new one had a micro chip imbedded in the cardboard cover which was read with a special reader and could be written into up to ten billion entries. In this day and age you weren't supposed to need a passport. But Relena's dream of a borderless, unified, human entity had proved to be futile. It was too hard to keep track of the movement of materials, goods, and people.

But some borders had been shuffled slightly, and a few countries had disappeared completely. Monaco, for one, had been absorbed by France three centuries ago. But some countries were indomitable; Germany, Russia, the United States, China, Japan, Australia, and several others were more or less as they had been for centuries, with their folk customs intact.

Germany had always been a tourist attraction; with the Alps in the south and the northern cities, with their ancient buildings and clean streets. Germany was one of the safest countries in present day ESUN. The German predilection for order and propriety made many crimes, especially against persons, almost nonexistent. The worst things a tourist might have to deal with were long lines and rude waiters. As long as papers were in order.

They hopped a buss and took it to the train station. From there they got a train to Trier, then Saarbrucken. About five minutes after they found an empty compartment there was a knock on the door.

"Die Ausweise, Bitte." Heero handed his papers over along with Relena's and Duo produced his.

"Danke."

The border official examined the papers while Relena held her breath, she could just see irate German officials hauling Duo off in handcuffs. Duo whistled almost soundlessly between his teeth and Heero merely waited. The genial official noticed Relena's nervousness but passed it off as something else. He smiled at her and, as her data chip was blank, assumed that it was her first time away from home.

"Frauline, don't worry. Germany is very strict about what should and shouldn't be done, but we do tend to make allowances for tourists." He rummaged in a small bag slung over his shoulder and produced a small pamphlet "Here, this is very helpful to young people like you. Read it carefully. It will tell you what you should and shouldn't do and help you to enjoy your stay in our country. It will help you stay out of trouble, find lodgings, facilities and many other useful things. Alf Wiedersehen."

"Danke fur Ihre Bemuhungen, Mein Herr. This will be very helpful."

"I see that you make an attempt to speak our language, but you know the wrong dialect for Karlsruhe. Too bad. But keep trying. It is a very nice thing to try to speak the language, no matter how badly."

Duo nearly choked trying not to laugh until the man was gone, then he dissolved. Heero merely grunted. "Damn, Relena. That was good. But the universal grunt here gets by on exactly that and pointing to things in a phrase book."

"Well, at least he knew I was trying. What now?"

"We sleep."

Heero pulled a blanket and pillow from the overhead and tossed them to Duo, then he got down two more and, after settling Relena in a corner, settled himself in the third. Relena never realized that he'd put Duo nearest the door then himself between her and attack.

Relena woke to a knock on the door. It was soft but insistent. Duo looked at Heero, who nodded. Duo opened the door and blinked at the Officer, who held out his hand and said "Die Ausweise, Bitte."

"Ja, Mien Herr. Es tut mir Leid. Do you want everyone's papers or just mine? Please, if you could, speak English. The lady doesn't speak this dialect."

"Ah, all the papers, Bitte. One last check before we reach Karlsruhe. The Maifest is in the city. You will like that, I think. And rock climbing. Yes?"

Duo grinned and deftly slipped between the Officer and Relena, so he wouldn't have a chance to get a good look at her. Heero handed him Relena's papers, then his own.

"Danke." The Officer peered around Duo and smiled slightly, then whispered. "Ah. Asleep is she? You will not come to Karlsruhe for another hour. "

"Danke, Herr Officer. I don't think she's asleep, just dozing. But I'm hoping she'll sleep until we get into town. We'll be looking for a place for a while. I'm afraid."

"Nein. A place there is next to the station. Very nice. Hostel . . . for the young people, Ja? You understand."

"Ja, ja. Bitte." Duo nodded. "If it isn't full."

"A place they will find." the officer paused and they all could see that he was trying to phrase what he wanted to say. Duo took him off the hook, addressing him in the dialect he was most comfortable with.

"I'm sorry sir. I was trying to make sure that my friends could join the conversation, but it's not going to work. Please, where can we find rooms at this time of night. I don't want my cousin out on the streets at this hour."

"The youth hotel will find you space. It is dormitory style, so they can move some cots around and make room. You must find a place. There is a curfew for anyone under eighteen. Although I believe you are older, still you could have problems with being stopped. It is safe, but it is not allowed to sleep in the parks."

"I hate sleeping in parks. I don't care if it is safe or not. I would never let my cousin do so. Thank you for all your help. Our papers are in order?"

"Oh, yes. Here they are. I added your border crossing to the data chips." The officer handed back the papers and left, closing the door carefully behind him.

Relena peeked out from behind Heero, she hadn't objected when Heero got between her and the door. She didn't want to be recognized any more than Heero or Duo did. "Are we ok? What did he say? Damnit! I tried so hard and no one told me that it was the wrong dialect. I wanted to try to blend in."

Duo smiled at Relena and filled Heero and her in on what the Officer had said. Relena made a face. She wasn't too happy with being separated from her two escorts, but Heero said it would be ok, so she relaxed.

They all napped the rest of the way to Karlsruhle and were awakened by a sharp rap on the door and a voice calling. "Karlsruhle, kinder."

Duo called "Danke, Danke" and opened the door so the Attendant would know that they really were awake.

Heero pulled the packs from the overhead and handed them around. Relena gave him a happy smile.

"Hn?"

"Don't grunt. Talk."

"What's that for?"

"You're really going to treat me like a real girl."

"Yes. You're not helpless."

Duo gave Relena two thumbs up over Heero's shoulder. She grinned back and returned the gesture. Heero glanced from one to the other and decided it wasn't worth worrying about.

"He's not really pre-verbal, you know."

"Yeah, Duo. I know. He just . . ." Relena squealed as Heero ran his hand down her side and tickled her. He smirked at her and then donned his pack, stepped into the hall and motioned for Duo and Relena to go ahead of him.

They managed to get to the station with a minimum of fuss, except for Relena getting hung on the door because she didn't know how to maneuver her pack in a tight space. The Attendant got her loose without comment and watched as they headed for the taxi stand.

The Attendant turned to the Customs Officer and remarked that he couldn't understand why two Preventer Agents and the Vice-Foreign Minister were wandering around Germany with false credentials that had been verified by ESUN. The Officer just shrugged, "If they are verified then they aren't false. Perhaps the young people merely want a vacation from their responsibilities."

Duo herded them across the station and groaned to himself. A station attendant was headed their way.

"Excuse me. A curfew there is."

Relena nodded, "Ja."

Duo addressed the Attendant over Relena's head. "Yes. Please, my German is good. We're headed for the hotel. We just came in on the train."

"You have proof?" The attendant looked stern and when Duo handed him their ticket stubs, examined them carefully. After checking the arrival time stamped on the stubs, he returned them.

"I'll escort you to the hotel, so that you don't get stopped again. This way."

Duo looked at a sign on the wall and stopped short. "Are you sure it's ok? That sign says authorized personnel only."

"Yes, I'm authorized and I'm escorting you. It's a shot cut to the hotel. It will save you having to pass three more check points. Come, you are tired and it is unnecessary."

"Well . . . thank you."

Relena touched Heero's arm and whispered. "Is this ok? I didn't think he was allowed to do that."

"Probably he shouldn't. But I really don't want to risk three check points this time of night, if we don't have to."

Duo had also given the man a sharp look. The bland, stoic (Germanic?) look the man gave back reassured him, so they followed him through a service corridor and came out in the back of the hostel where he left them with the admonition to go straight to the check in desk.

At the check in desk the night attendant eyed them for a moment and then told them there was no room.

"I'm sorry, the young lady we can take. But there is no room in the men's dormitory. I don't know what to do."

Duo gave the woman his best pleading-with-granny look and begged. "Please, it's past curfew. Where could we go? We'll get in trouble."

"Yes, I know. The young lady can stay. All we have to do is slip her into the dormitory quietly. So as not to wake the ones there already. But what to do with you two?"

Heero indicated their packs. "We have sleeping bags. We could sleep in the lobby on the couches. It's ok. We're going to camp out later, so we're prepared."

The attendant shook her head. "It is not allowed to sleep in the lobby. You must have a bed. Let me think."

Relena poked Duo in the side to gain his attention. "Why can't you sleep in the lobby? It doesn't say anywhere that you can't?" Relena let her eyes sweep the walls again, she didn't see a sign.

"Relena, if you try to do that, you'll drive yourself crazy. In Germany if you don't see a sign that says it's ok, it probably isn't. Always ask before doing anything out of the ordinary."

"Oh. Ok. But are we staying here or not."

"Probably. They won't let us wander around after curfew. "

After consulting with someone on the phone, the attendant said they would set up something in the hall outside the men's dormitory. "It is not done, as a usual thing, but I have permission from the supervisor. You are not permitted in the streets after curfew. It is not done."

"Yes Ma'am. Thank you so much. This is very accommodating of you. I would not wish to get a summons my first hour in the city. It would not be a good thing. Oh, excuse me . . . is it permitted to ask your name."

The attendant pointed to her chest then laughed softly. Her name tag was covered by a sweater.

"Mien Namen." The tag said Frau Schmidt

Duo thanked the woman effusively for her help, filled out sign in cards for all three of them, and handed Heero and Relena theirs for signatures. When the cards were sighed, Frau Schmidt handed them keys to lockers for their packs.

Heero gave the woman a small smile and hefted the packs. Relena was tired so he took her pack and tucked it in the locker provided and handed her the key, as well as the pyjamas he'd rummaged while the attendant and Duo were doing the paperwork.

After seeing that Relena actually went in the dormitory, Duo and Heero followed the attendant to the hall outside the men's dormitory. The packs went into lockers there and they helped the woman set up their beds.

Frau Schmidt was not a happy person. The only thing that was available was two thin camp cot mattresses. Duo sighed and whispered to Heero, "Man and here I was hoping for a nice closed bed. Those are great. But at least it's out of the weather."

Frau Schmidt shook her head. "It is not want I would want my son to sleep on. But it will have to do. If you are spending another night here, you should check back in first thing in the morning."

Heero ventured into the wilds of German, saying softly. "Danke, Frauline. Guten nacht."

Duo grinned at the woman and started laying out his sleeping bag on top of the mattress. She gave both men a smile and walked off, muttering about over crowding and new facilities.

Both men settled down on the mattresses and immediately went to sleep. Duo settled quicker than Heero, relying on his partner to watch his back. Heero smiled at Duo and settled himself down, as well. They both were still a little edgy, so he set himself to wake at any noise within several feet of their resting place.

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"Huh. Wha' . . . 'Ro?" Duo grunted again and woke ready to do whatever. But Heero just grumbled, "Frau Schmidt tossed a rolled up sock at me and said to get up before the wake up for the dorms sounded."

Duo rolled out of his sleeping bag and started rolling it up. He took Heero's and rolled it up too. Heero was taking the mattresses up and getting them out of the way of traffic.

"Good morning to you, Kinder." Duo jumped slightly, this wasn't Frau Schmidt. "I am Frau Muller. Frau Schmidt has told me of your small problem. Sign here, bitte."

Heero examined the card and finding the information to be correct signed it. When he handed it back to the lady, she smiled at him. "I am sorry that there was not a place for you last night, but you signed in so late that you are lucky that the supervisor allowed you to stay at all."

"It was very kind of her to make arrangements for us. I don't know want we would have done otherwise."

"Enough of that. Do you have any plans for today?"

"Not really, Frau. Is there anything good happening that we should know about?"

"Yes, there is a Maibaum in the platz. If you hurry your showers and breakfast, you could see it."

So Heero and Duo rushed through showers and shaving and went to find Relena.

She was waiting for them just outside the dinning room, pacing impatiently.

"Come on. I'm starving. What's good? I'm not eating blood sausages. I'm sure they're . . . what?"

Duo was staring at Relena, she'd put her hair up in a traditional German style. Two braids high on the sides, looped back on themselves and fastened with ribbons. She looked cute and young, nothing like herself.

"Wow, Relly, you sure look cute. Doesn't she Heero?"

Heero managed a nod, he wasn't sure about fashions, so he was leery of voicing an opinion. "Nice. Looks very . . . efficient."

Relena rolled her eyes at Duo, who nearly choked himself trying not to laugh.

They entered the dining room and saw that they were very nearly the first in. It was cafeteria style and Duo grinned exclaiming, "French toast. And bacon. Yum."

Relena took a tray and started through the line, with Duo right behind her. Heero brought up the rear and watched in some amusement as Relena scolded Duo for his choices of breakfast food. It saved him the trouble of doing the same thing.

"Duo, you can't eat that much bacon. You'll get an upset stomach . . . Duo, milk? . . ." Relena put a glass of milk on his tray and Heero vowed to see he drank it.

Duo put up with Relena with good nature and didn't seem to mind her scolding. Until . . .

"Relly, I don't want grapefruit. It's too sour. Makes my teeth hurt. I want french toast and pancakes. And some of those little sausages. They're so good. Germans do sausages really well."

Relena removed the grapefruit half to her own tray and put a glass of orange juice on the tray instead. She didn't force the issue, just made sure that his breakfast was as balanced as possible. Heero snickered to Duo. "She's got you whipped."

"Yeah. I notice that you've got milk. You hate milk."

"Shut up."

They found seats and Relena looked around for an attendant.

"Whatcha want?"

"Coffee. Lots of coffee. And cream, real cream, not that powdered crap."

"Bitte, Mein Frau. Kaffee mit kasse, danke."

The server brought them cups of coffee and a pitcher of cream. She smiled at them and thought that they looked like a nice group of young people. Duo grinned back and thanked her for the coffee and then looked at his watch.

"Oh . . . can you tell me what time the Maibaum will be?"

"Ja. Not too soon. It is at 10:00am you have time to finish breakfast without rushing. You will need directions to the platz " the woman produced a city map from a pocket and handed it to Duo. "Here is the place where it is."

"Thank you. Oh and I'll take one refill on the coffee. Please."

Heero was eyeing his glass of milk with resignation. He was lactose intolerant, by now, and knew he was going to have an upset stomach in about twenty minutes. Not good, if you were trying to enjoy yourself.

Duo gulped his milk and then handed Relena the map. "Look at the map. There are places to see down the side. If we leave soon, we'll have time to see something. If it's on the way to the Maibaum."

While Relena was consulting the map, Duo switched glasses with Heero. Unfortunately, Relena caught him.

"Duo, that's Heero's milk. If you want more, get your own. And be careful. I don't want you sick. Heero, I'll get you another glass."

Duo smacked Heero on the back of the head. "You didn't tell her did you? She means well, so you should tell her, Stupid."

"Tell me what? What's going on?" Relena looked from Heero to Duo and then back. "Heero. Don't sit there hanging your head and looking at me through your fringe. What's up?" Relena held up a hand as Duo started to answer. "No, it's Heero's to tell."

"I'mlactoseintolerant." Heero managed to rush and mumble at the same time. But Relena, used to political maneuverings which included such end runs, understood him perfectly.

"So, you can't drink milk or eat ice cream. The perfect soldier isn't so perfect anymore. So?" Relena examined Heero's red face. "You're embarrassed! Why? If you'd told me, I could have gotten you some of those drops. You can be so . . . so . . ."

"Hard headed? Stubborn? . . . ummm . . . I'll think of more in a minute." Duo laughed at Heero, who glared at him in a way that would have had anyone else on the run.

Relena snarled slightly and bopped Heero on the arm. "Stupid. If you'd told me, I'd have gotten you some of those drops that fix that. God, you're so stubborn, sometimes."

Heero blinked at Duo and mouthed 'drops?' Duo just shrugged. He'd been telling Heero that he should tell Relena about this for months. Now it was out in the open and Heero could relax, she wouldn't be worrying at him about it anymore.

Relena gave Heero a warning glare and slapped the glass of orange juice in front of him. "You drink this. I don't want Duo too full. He'll get sick. You two. I swear . . ." Relena huffed in exasperation. "You don't have to be iron men anymore. You fought and bled and nearly died. Enjoy what you made, . . . please. " The last came out a little plaintively.

"Ok. Don't have a spaz." Duo eyed his plate. If he ate that last piece of toast and the sausage, he was going to be too full. "Heero eat that toast. And Relena . . . if you'll eat the sausage, it won't go to waste."

"Yes it will."

"Huh?"

"My waist."

Duo gave the joke the snicker it deserved and Heero smiled too.

"Ohmugod. Fan me quick! Heero smiled again." Relena mock fainted and fanned herself with her hand.

After finishing their breakfast and taking their trays to the cleanup window, they headed for the platz where the Maibaum was to be held.

Relena demanded to know what a Maibaum was and Heero explained that it was a May Pole with ribbons. There was to be a traditional May dance, where the dancers were dressed n traditional German costumes and they danced around the pole intertwining the ribbons until they made a braid around the pole. Ending. "If it's done right, the effect is supposed to be very pretty. I think you'll like it."

"Sounds very nice. How far is it?"

"Several blocks. Duo and I could walk it. If you don't think you can make it, we can take the bus."

"Heero, get a grip. You've been watching me work out. I can run two miles. And keep up with that intermediate Preventers workout. I think I can manage . . . " Relena consulted the map for herself. "Seven blocks in three hours."

"You usually don't want to walk that far."

"Heero. I'm usually wearing heels or those damn fuck me sandals that . . ." Relena started giggling at the looks on both men's faces. "Well, that's what they're called. Just ask Une."

Duo snickered. "I know more about those damn things than I want to."

Relena linked arms with Duo and suddenly twisted, slipping around behind Duo's back and managed to get him in an arm behind the back come-along. Heero goggled slightly, and if Duo would have noticed, he'd have said Heero was pole axed. Relena had gotten the drop on Duo.

"Ow owowowow. I give. I give. What? Anything." Duo hammed it up for Relena. She _had _gotten the drop on him, but they both knew that if he really wanted loose, she didn't have a chance.

"You frowned Heero down but now I want to know." Relena tried to twist Duo's arm a little, feeling the muscles roll under her hands. It was like trying to twist an iron bar, but she persisted. "How do you know so much about makeup and fuck me sandals?"

"Ok ok. I'll tell, but if you laugh, I'll put something nasty in your sleeping bag, see if I don't."

Relena let Duo go and he grinned at her. And started telling her his story.

"Ok. I'm . .. Umm. . .Heero, help me out here."

"He's the female decoy in a lot of our operations. He looks feminine enough if he shaves really close and uses enough foundation." Relena goggled at Duo. The only thing feminine about him that she could see, was his hair and she could only stare at him

"Duo You're not . . . I mean. . . that's just twisted."

Duo bowed to Relena. "Thank you very much, my lady. But I do look the part, if I dress for it. A little padding and a pair of high heels will fool almost anyone. People see what they expect to see. Long hair, high heels and a simper. A little swish when I walk and I can get away with it."

Duo demonstrated, swinging his hips and looking coyly over his shoulder. Heero and Relena dissolved in laughter and had to sit down on a nearby bench.

"Ok, ok. I get it. That's just perverted. But it's funny as hell. I bet they get the shock of their lives when they get a gun in their faces."

Duo snickered rather cruelly. "You bet they do, especially when they yank the braid. That just punches all the wrong buttons. The only one who touches the hair besides me, is Heero.

They gathered themselves together and headed for the platz again. As they walked Relena indulged in the womanly occupation of window shopping. She noticed that Duo was as interested in the contents of some of the windows as she was. Mostly the souvenir shops although there were a few other types of shops along the way too.

"Oh look. Swiss Army Knives. I've always wanted one. That one in the window is perfect, look at all the . . . there's a screwdriver . . . a pair of plyers . . . oh and four knife blades. Heero it has twenty-four things in it. And it's not that big. How much . . . damn." Duos' face fell, he didn't have enough money on him to purchase the knife. He figured in his head and glanced at Heero, who shook his head.

"Between us we don't have that much cash. Sorry, Duo. Maybe we can come back later and get it."

Duo sighed and looked in the window again. "Probably not. It's a discontinued model. And there are three 'blades' that I really would use a lot. Oh well, not the first disappointment in my life."

Relena looked in the window and saw the knife. The reason Duo wanted it so bad was it had several bits that were specifically for working on guns.

"Heero, I need to use the you-know-what. You two go on . . . I'll catch up to you."

Heero eyed the surrounding area then sighed "Ok, but we're only going as far as that bench." He watched Duo wander on ahead, looking around like any tourist would, only he was also looking for any threat to their group. "What are you really going to do? You can't use a credit card. It'll lead paparazzi right to us."

Relena looked at Heero, she was about to make a confession, and she didn't know how he would take it.

"I have my own quirks from the war." She dug into her back pack and pulled out an obscene amount of cash. "I carry this every where. I usually pin it into my bra or underskirt. But since we're carrying packs, I just stuffed it in the inside bottom pocket. I feel funny without it."

Heero shook his head. He'd seen the bulges from time to time but hadn't wondered overly about it. Now he got a cold chill. What if some mugger had found out about it?

"Go Heero. Duo's looking at us." So Heero went resolving to have a stern talk with Relena later.

Relena went into the store and found out that her German wasn't up to the task. She tugged the clerk to the window and pointed to what she wanted. He shook his head and tried to get her to look at other knives more appropriate to a girl. She insisted and pointed to a display of gift wrapping. The man nodded in understanding and took the knife out of the window, rang her up and waited for her to give him a credit card. When she handed him cash, he gave her a very odd look and took the bills to a machine. When he ran them through the machine, it beeped softly and spat them back out. He fingered them and held them up to the light. Relena waited patiently, she knew it wasn't that often that he got large denomination Euro bills.

After he rang her up, he started wrapping the knife box in gift paper. She realized that he'd charged her for gift wrapping, so while he was wrapping, she examined the knives displayed in the shop cases. Suddenly she saw it, the rock climbers handy, and she wanted it. She called the man over and pointed. He said something that had Frauline and neine in it. She just pointed and waved bills at him. He shrugged and rang her up for the knife.

She hurried to catch up to Heero and Duo. She found them sitting on the bench in front of a pastry shop eating Apfelkuggle and watching people walk by.

"Duo? Close your eyes and hold out your hand."

Duo did as she told him to, and squinched up his face, expecting he didn't know what but willing to trust her. She put the wrapped box in his hand and watched his face as he turned the prettily wrapped thing in his hands.

"What? Relly, it's not my birthday or anything. Why . . ."

Relena smiled at Duo. "Because I wanted to. It's ok. Open it."

Heero and Relena watched as Duo opened the present carefully. He picked the tape off the paper, carefully folded it and tucked it into his pack, along with the ribbon from around it. After that, he opened the unmarked box and shook the contents out into his hand.

"Oh! Relly, thank you! Thanks so much. But how. I mean you . . ."

"Duo, you're sputtering." Heero put his elbow on Duo's shoulder, hugging in public; especially same sex couples, was frowned on. He took the belt pouch out of the box and unbuckled Duo's belt, while he was slipping the pouch onto his belt, he took the opportunity to hug him and push his chin up with a finger.

Duo stood up, buckled his belt and hugged Relena, murmuring. "Thanks, Relly. I'll pay you back."

"You will not. You don't pay back for presents."

Duo hummed for a second then thanked her again and set to examining the knife happily.

Heero reached out and gave Duo's braid a yank, and found Relena in his face.

"Heero Yuy, _we_ do _not_ pull hair. It's not nice. Do _not_ do that again."

Heero blinked for a second. He'd never seen Relena like this, she really looked mad.

Duo put his arm around her shoulders. "Don't sweat it. If he yanks too hard I'll eat him a new one."

Relena did a double take and said intelligently. "Huh?"

"Yeah. You never heard this one; in fact, you've never heard any of them. The saying goes, 'he got his ass eaten out." Right? Well, the corollary to that one is, 'Lady Une ate around it and let it fall out' ergo, he needs a new one. Get it?"

Relena nodded.

Heero just sighed and put his head in his hands. He had given up on Duo. He seemed determined to corrupt Relena and she was cooperating whole heartedly.

"Come on you two, we'll miss the Maibaum. We've got an hour to get there, but if you keep dwaddeling, we'll never make it

Heero smiled at Relena, she had given Duo a present. When she'd done that, she'd given him a present too. Duo's happy smile was worth more to him than almost anything.

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They managed to make it to the platz with plenty of time to spare. Relena hopped up onto a low wall and sat, kicking her feet and examining her knife. She and Duo spent sometime comparing the two, with Heero looking on and offering comments from time to time.

"I don't know why it bought it. I'll never need it but . . . Well."

"Relly, you're entitled to a damn knife if you want it. Whether you'll ever use it or not. Just put it on your belt and watch the dancing. It's about to begin."

They watched the dancers as they wove the ribbons around the May Pole, dancing to the music of accordions, tubas and other instruments. Relena laughed happily and clapped her hands. When she stood on the wall and started dancing in place, imitating the skipping dance she was watching, Heero moved to stand where he could catch her if she fell.

"Excuse me. It is not allowed that you dance on the wall. Please get down before I must issue you a summons. I must ask for your papers, please."

"Oh! I'm so sorry. I . . well, I should have known better, but it looks like so much fun. Heero, help me down." Relena hopped into Heero arms and he set her on her feet. They endured a lecture on teenage foolishness with good grace, apologized again and walked away after retrieving their papers from the Policeman.

"Wow, the first thing they want are papers. I'm going to put them in this pocket, so they are easier to get to."

Duo, looking into Relena's pack, nearly strangled when he swallowed the wrong way. Relena patted him on the back gently. When he recovered, he wiped his streaming eyes on a handkerchief Heero handed him, and exploded quietly.

"Relena, that's a lot of cash to be carrying around. How much is there?"

"I don't know, exactly. Enough to buy a car, I hope."

"Enough to . . . Relena give it to me. Now!" Relena started to argue, but one look at Duo's face shut her up. Heero was looking wary. Duo looked scary with his eyes narrowed and a hard cold expression on his usually animated face."If you want to commit suicide, please don't take Heero and me with you. Give!"

Relena handed the money to Duo, who counted it and then divided it into three rolls of bills. He gave one to Heero and another to Relena, the third he kept for himself.

"I'll make sure you get this back when we get home. This way we all have some of the bills and, if anyone gets mugged or dipped, we've still got money. You want to spend any of it, just ask." Duo shook his head. "Damnit, Relena. I though you had more sense than that."

"Duo, I'm so sorry. It's just that. . . well, I . . . need to feel that I can . . . it's so stupid. It's my 'get back' money."

"Get back money? What?"

"I always have enough money on me that I can get back to Sanq. Even if I have to buy a car and drive myself."

Heero put his arms around Relena, who looked like she was about to cry. Duo ducked his head and sighed. "Come here. Relly, I'm sorry. I should have asked instead of biting your head off. You just scared me."

Relena tugged at Duo until they were both in Heero's strong arms, held and comforted by his unyielding presence. Heero held them, while they held each other. He was so glad that Duo and Relena were getting along now. He didn't feel as if he was torn between them anymore.

Duo kissed Relena on the forehead and Heero on the lips. "We better break this up. It's not the done thing, you know."

Heero shouldered his pack and watched as Relena and Duo shouldered theirs, the light day packs were perfect for short day excursions, holding a jacket, money, drinks, and sandwiches. They had left their travel packs back at the hostel, where their things would be safe locked in their lockers.

"I don't want to eat sandwiches. I want a real meal. I hate eating a heavy meal at night. That's why I hate those damn banquets so much. I always feel like I'm going to explode. Except for the night Duo danced with me. I got to work off a lot of the food. I'd rather eat a big lunch and a small supper. So . . ."

Duo laughed at Heero's stunned expression. His reticence seemed to discourage even Relena from confiding in him. Duo was the only person who could see past his deeply ingrained training.

"You never told me you wanted to work off the meal. If . . . "

"Damnit Heero, it should be enough that I want to dance. I don't ask much of you. Only that you be my friend. Duo . . . damnit . . . " Relena brushed at her eyes, she'd given up on Heero as a lover but she'd thought that he was her friend.

"Relly, don't cry over that ox. If you want Heero to do something, you have to come out and ask him. He doesn't take hints worth shit. Shoot him, he gets the idea; hint, around and all you'll get is a blank look."

"I'm sorry Relena, Duo's right. If you want to dance, you have to tell me. Things like saying 'they look like they are having fun' usually go right over my head. The only reason I know about that one is Duo clued me in."

Relena sighed, wiped her eyes and blew her nose. When she tried to give the bandana back to Heero, he smirked a little and told her to keep it.

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Duo led the way to a restaurant. In his usual way, he'd managed to make friends with several shop clerks and some man on the street. Their wanderings had led them in and out of several shops and his constant chatter had gotten them lots of information. How, Relena couldn't tell, the muscle reading trick didn't seen pertinent, but Heero had watched with amusement as Duo picked brains for an hour.

"This is the place the people who live in the city come to eat. No tourist traps for us, thank you very much. The food's good, and cheap; and the place is clean. I'll get the menu and translate it for you."

Heero smirked, "Duo, you forget. I can read German. I just don't speak it very well."

Relena nodded. She'd studied German and thought she spoke it well enough to get by. The dialects were what had defeated her. But written German was the same all over. She could read the menu for herself.

Duo grinned at them. "Ok, but if you wind up with something nasty, don't blame me."

Relena grinned at him and pointed to a table by the windows. "I'd like to sit there. Will you tell the hostess, please? "

"Sure. And while I'm at it, I'll see if I can't find a nice biergarten. We can go drinking tonight." Duo took the menus the waitress gave him and handed them around. " Now, real food. That breakfast is way too far in the past for me. Lemesee . . . hmmm . . ." Duo read the menu and listened with half an ear as Heero and Relena hesitantly translated the menu between them.

"Saurbraten, saurkruat. I don't want any of that. I don't care that much for kraut."

Duo rolled his eyes, "Cheesewhiz, Relena. Germans don't eat kraut six times a week and twice on Sunday. There's all kinds of great foods. Pork chops, and schnitz und gep, and noodles . . . here, "Duo pointed to something on the menu. "This is meat loaf German style, with gravy, and that's blood sausage . . . no, not for you I don't think. Heero likes it. And then there's . . . . ummmm yeah, I'm having Tafelspitz, Heero'll have Himmel und Erde, and you can have nice, safe, hackbraten mit . . . ummm, mashed potatoes and gravy, and there's a carrot side that's good. Shall I order for everyone? Or do you want to scare the waitress to death."

Relena swatted him and stuck her nose in the air. "I'll have something simple, thank you. I don't want something fancy."

"Relena! You can't get simpler than meat loaf, mashed potatoes, gravy and carrots. We'll . . . Ah here's the waitress." Duo switched smoothly into German and smiled at the waitress, who immediately turned to mush. "Hello, lovely. I'll have the braised beef with horseradish, pickled beets and potato cakes. The other gentleman will have pureed apples and potatoes with blood sausage; you've got it listed as heaven and earth. And the young lady will have the meatloaf dinner. Thank you. Oh, and we'll all have Black Forest Tort with whipped cream for desert, and coffee. "

Relena sighed, she really wanted to try traditional German dishes, but she drew the line at blood in any form. Snails, yes; and even sweet breads, but not blood. That was just . . . not appetizing.

"Relly, you can taste mine. If you like that I'll see what I can do about ordering you something else you'll like. But for right now, bland would probably be better for you. You've been upset and you don't need the Kaisers revenge on top of everything else. Unusual foods will scramble your innards for sure."

Heero nodded, finding out that her dresser was selling her clothes couldn't have been good for her system. Then spending four hours on a train and sleeping the rest of the night in a strange bed, her system had to be on overload.

"I'll admit I've been feeling a little queasy. Breakfast helped a lot, and the walk did too. I feel a lot better than I did, but I really want to eat something truly German."

"That meatloaf won't taste anything like American style, the spices are completely different. I think you'll like it. I'll give you some of my beef and horseradish. We'll see how your tummy handles it."

They sat in companionable silence, looking out the windows and just enjoying the company, until the waitress brought their food and plunked a small pitcher of yellow liquid on the table along with three wine goblets.

"Maiwine; on the house. It's very nice this year, the . . . my English . . . bah . . . I don't know the word. The thing we make in the wine for Springen. You'll like it I think."

Duo thanked her and complimented her on her English. She blushed and left.

"Ok! She brought us Maiwine. It's really good. here, eat up, and we'll have wine."

They ate their lunches with enjoyment. The food was well prepared and tasted as good as it smelled. The portions were not exactly huge, but could be considered generous. Heero helped himself to the last of Duo beef and part of Relena's meat loaf and potatoes he turned his nose up at the carrots.

"I don't eat everything that gets close to me. I'm getting picky in my old age."

Duo snorted. "He's fibbin' Relly. He'll eat just about anything, you know."

"Won't."

"Will too."

"Won't. Don't like that shit you drink in the morning. Gah." Heero shivered dramatically, he'd gotten hold of Duo's shake by mistake . . . once.

Relena had heard about that, bitterly and in detail, at the time and she couldn't help laughing.

"This wine is excellent, it's a Riesling, but what is the . . . something . . . I can't quite place it."

"They steep sweet woodruff in the wine, for Spring. It's only available for a little while. You can only use the tenderest new shoots. After that it's too bitter. Drink up."

They sat for a while more, sipping their wine and going through some pamphlets the waitress brought them when Duo asked about beer gardens.

After their meal, they went back to the hostel to check on their reservations, it wouldn't do to come back and find out that they didn't have a bed again. They confirmed their places and asked about a safe beer garden. Frau Muller shook her head and told them that they were all safe, but did they want touristy or German.

"German! I don't care if we don't speak the language. I want a real German beer garden."

"Ok, real German it is. We'll go to this one. It's only three blocks away, so we shouldn't have trouble getting back before curfew. Let's go " Duo headed for the door. "We can spend the rest of the day sight seeing and wandering around. The garden opens at about six . . . "

Frau Muller tapped her finger nail on the counter to get their attention. "The garden opens at exactly six this evening and last call is at one. On the dot."

"Yes Ma'am. Thank you." They all burst out laughing as all three of them had spoken at once.

They spent the rest of the day ducking Duo's pranks, looking at fountains and other attractions and wound up at the garden at six exactly. In time for the proprietor to unlock the door and let them in.

They sat on the benches and waited for something to happen. Which it did. A rush of local people came through the door and took places around the tables; long old fashioned dinning hall tables.

The tables had loaves of bread and sliced cold meats and cheeses on trenchers down their middles. They were soon given Maibock in gigantic steins and had joined in singing trinklieder. Relena had no idea what they were singing, but Duo sang with gusto and Heero seemed to be enjoying himself. So she sang along as best she could and if she wasn't singing the words just right no one really cared.

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"Bier herr, bire herr, oder ick fall dun!"

Relena giggled a little. She wasn't drunk, just pleasantly buzzed. A liter of beer will do that to a person, even with one of Duo's Dagwood sandwiches.

"Relena . . . its bier hier, bier hier, doer ich fall um." Duo caroled happily.

"Soll das Bier im Keller liegenUnd ich hier die Ohnmacht kriegen?"

Heero sighed, they were going to attract all kinds of attention. The street was still rather heavily trafficked, and Duo and Relena were leaning on each other and singing away, as Duo tried to teach the song to Relena, whose grasp of even her shaky German was rapidly fading.

"Give up. You're both drunk. You'll have every . . ." Heero suddenly stopped stock still in the middle of the sidewalk. He'd been in mission mode since they'd left Sanq. He propped Duo up, tucked Relena under the other arm and joined in the song. It didn't make any difference how much attention they attracted, they were just three young Sanq students in Germany for Maifest. They could sing in the street if they wanted.

Wein hier, Wein hier, oder ich fall um, juchhe!Wein hier, Wein hier, oder ich fall um!

Frau Schmidt looked up from the paper she was reading to smile at the three, "Ach, Di kinder."

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Relena woke the next morning with a slightly fuzzy tongue and an impression that she'd done things she shouldn't, but she wasn't sure what.

When they met in the railway station for breakfast, Duo didn't look any the worse for wear and neither did Heero

"I hate you both. I feel funny, not ha ha. More like ugh. And there you stand, looking like butter wouldn't melt in your mouths. Damnit. Coffee. Must have coffee. Light and sweet."

So Duo ordered coffee and they wandered around the rail way staion, drinking coffee, or Kaffee mit sahne ud zucker. The vendor had laughed at Relena when she'd made the mistake of trying to order for herself and ordered something vulgar instead of coffee with cream and sugar.

"Ok Relena, we've spent two days here. We need to move on. What's next?"

"Camping out. I've never really camped out."

"I thought you went on a safari or something."

"Oh that. I was young. It was arraigned by Daddy. I never saw anything, or got to do anything for myself. And that rhinoceros? It was ridiculous. Some stupid, arranged, photo op by the park.. I smelled like rino for two days." Relena shuddered dramatically. "I brought all my stuff. Ground cloth, sleeping bag. Little tent, everything. I want to use it."

Heero had started selecting pamphlets from a rack on the wall. He brought them to Duo who started going through them, looking for a camp sight that offered more than the usual.

"Look . . . here's a camp site that allows tents and open fires. We can get in there as it's early in the season. It offers Edelweiss tours. You can actually see Edelweiss blooming. When it's the right season. Leontopodium alpinum, you know."

"Show off."

"Who me? I'm shocked."

Relena gave Heero an arch look and then jumped on Duo who yelped then sat down hard, with Relena clinging to his shoulders. She managed to pin him for about half a second, then he stood up with Relena still on his back. Heero pealed her off Duo and started tickling her. She squealed and wriggled finally, apologizing and begging for mercy.

They quit horsing around after getting several disapproving looks. Duo went back to examining the pamphlets and exclaimed. "Look here. We can check into that campground I was talking about and it's only half an hour's hike to some of the best rock climbing in the area. What do you think Heero? Relly is good. I've watched her work. The only thing I wouldn't want her to do is a vertical hang. Her hands aren't big enough."

Relena smirked at Heero, he still tended to view her as that idealistic young girl of several years ago. "I can manage quite well, although I do think Duo is right. My hands are too small for a full vertical hang."

Heero rummaged in his pack and pulled out a map, which he spread on the ground. They squatted around it and Duo and Heero spent the next few minutes comparing pamphlets and locations.

"Most of the named climbs have been ruined. They're all doctored so that people don't get hurt. There's Hold fasts all over, and all kinds of other hardware. The numbered climbs are good. They're rated for beginner to expert. And numbered as to location. Here . . .this one looks good. Number. . . .5-1136."

"It's here as 1136. What's the deal?" Relena couldn't figure out why the numbers were different in the pamphlet

"It's rated five. Beginner is one; expert is five. The 1136 is the map designation."

"Oh. We're going to climb a five?"

"Sure are. You're good enough, if we help you a little. A very little." Duo folded the map, tucked the pamphlets away and picked up his pack. "If we take the train tonight, we can be there by early morning. I'll make a call and see if we can't get into the camp ground."

After calling Une and getting her to make arrangements, Duo went to the ticket window to get tickets. He was glad they'd brought their full packs today, as the train was leaving in fifteen minutes. He snagged his cell back out of his pocket and called the hostel to tell them that they were heading for the slopes and wouldn't be back that night.

"Come on, hurry, we'll miss the train. I got reservations in the campground and we have to catch the train. it leaves in fifteen minutes. Relly ,did you leave anything in the hostel?"

"No, the attendant said not to, as they were cleaning for the week end. I . . Duo . . . you managed to get reservations? How?"

"My outstanding personality and winning smile. Come on."

Heero smirked at Duo behind Relena's back, he knew what was going on. They'd both spoken to Une before they'd finalized any plans. The only people they were dodging were the paparazzi.

They got on the train and were relieved to find out that they didn't have to present papers as they weren't crossing any borders. They settled in for the ride, relaxing and gossiping; especially Duo and Relena. They covered a wide variety of subjects including import/export from/to the colonies and fuel Tarriffs. Heero slept.

The tiny town sported the grandiose name of Koniglicher Hugel(Royal Hill) It was one of those picturesque towns that had been built just before the first space colony was begun. They'd modeled it after towns built in the 17th century BC (Before Colony)

Relena and Heero headed straight out of the station, but Duo lingered for several minutes gathering more pamphlets.

"Duo, you're going to break your. . . " Heero was startled when Duo clamped a hand over his mouth.

"Ssshh! Not so loud. I'm going to make her a scrapbook. Give me the stuff you've got that we don't actually need. I'm going to mail it to myself. I've already made the mailer. All I have to do is stuff this in it and drop it in the box."

Heero gave Duo one of his special smiles, one of the ones he reserved for very special people. Duo smiled back, his amethyst eyes glinting with love.

Relena had walked a little ahead, giving them some private time. She stopped at a kiosk with displays of maps. It was to help tourists find the various campgrounds and attractions. Duo leaned on her shoulder and mumbled. "Help me find the camp. We need to be there by two to confirm our reservations. I'd hate to lose it by being late. And here late is five minutes."

Relena eyed her watch and realized that it had stopped. She had no idea of when. She'd been relying on Heero or Duo to keep them on schedule.

"This tiny piece of shit has stopped. I'll need a new battery for it. If we don't hurry ,we'll get there just on time. If we hurry, we can get checked in, find a camping spot we like, and come back to get me a new battery. Up to you two."

"We could jog to the camp site. It's not that far. Duo and I have run farther, in the dark. But. . . can you keep up?"

Relena shrugged into her pack. "Why don't we find out. If I can't keep up, I'll yell. I'm not ruining our vacation by hurting myself, but it'd be nice to see if I can do it . . . as long as you set a pace I have a chance of sticking to."

Heero shouldered his pack and watched as Duo finished fastening the straps on his. They checked each others straps and both turned to check Relena. Then they started off at an easy jog. Relena should be able to keep up with this pace. It was half the pace Preventers used as mission standard. The pace every Preventer should be able to keep up with.

Relena started to object, then decided to accept that they weren't cutting her anymore slack than they would any other Non Gundam Agent. The pace was one that she could maintain for quite a while. It was the speed that her trainer set the tread mill to. She'd run this pace for a while and could keep it up for a reasonable stretch of time. She'd never run it under a load before.

About half way there Relena called a halt.

"Guys. I can't keep this up with this pack. It's throwing me off balance, and going up hill, I'm afraid I'll fall and hurt myself. I'm sorry."

Heero and Duo had both been keeping an eye on her and had known she was struggling but not quite why. They'd both decided independently to let her call her own pace. Now Heero examined the pack and Duo checked Relena, quickly taking her pulse and running a hand over her arm to check how heavily she was sweating.

"Pack's off balance. I'm going to rearrange it." He quickly did so "Duo?"

"Ok here. Pulse, good; respiration . . . not bad. She's ok . . . except for the hot spot on her shoulder. I think it's just she's not used to running under a load. You take it?"

"Sure. Piggy back it."

Relena watched as Duo piggy backed her pack with Heero's so he could carry both of them. She wasn't about to let her pride ruin their fun. She'd let Heero carry it with heart felt thanks.

"Thank you, Heero. I'm good to go, if you two are ready."

Duo gave Relena a thumbs up and they started off again. Heero carrying Relena's pack without trouble.

They got to the camp ground in less than forty minutes. Very good for Relena, not so good for the two Preventers, but they had held back considerably for Relena's sake. Relena laughed as Heero dumped the packs and Duo made faces at his watch.

"That bad huh?"

Heero shrugged. "For us . . . well. But for you good."

"Oh be still my heart! High praise from the great Yuy."

Heero smirked at Relena. He knew she was just teasing him. He'd learned to give praise where it was deserved. New recruits could be especially sensitive to a frown at the wrong time and Une had finally gotten him to understand that even the older men looked up to him and he could ruin someone easily.

"Not high praise. You don't need your ego stroked like some newbie. You're intermediate, or so Duo says. If you're intermediate, you didn't do that well. But that's not making allowances for the fact that you've never run under a load before; so I guess I could give you a 3.5 out of 5. Besides, you had the intelligence to admit you were having trouble, rather than tough it out and become a . . . er . . . liability to the mission." Heero smiled at Relena, who was glowing under the praise. He considered her one of those people he didn't need to coddle.

Duo grinned at the two and dumped his pack with Heero's and Relenas'. He went into the small market to the check in desk and got their reservations. The clerk couldn't help smiling at the young man who collected their papers, bought sodas and chattered so happily. After spending several minutes gossiping with the clerk, Duo finally sighed. "I wish I knew which spot was best. I know you're not supposed to have a favorite, but if you were staying here, which spot would you pick.

The clerk grinned at Duo's not so subtle pumping. "I would stay in the Lap of God. It's a wonderful place. Slightly removed from the main path, but not so far away that you have troubles. Fires are allowed in the fire pits only. We provided the wood. You must buy it. No gathering of wood is allowed. The wood we have here is sustainably harvested. Here is information on everything you are allowed to do. Please be sure to read it all. I would hate for you to be asked to leave, or even get a fine."

"Thank you so much. I know you're not really supposed to recommend a site, but . . . I really appreciate this. We're climbing 1136 in the morning. Any suggestions?"

"Not really. it's sometimes called Tau-Esser, the rope eater, so check all your cordage. But I don't have to tell you that. You Preventors are always very careful."

"Ok thanks. I better get out of here, before my friends come in and drag me out. See you later."

Duo hopped off the porch in front of the market and scooped up his pack. Heero and Relena gathered up theirs and followed him as he explained about the Lap of God. When they got there, they found that it was a slight dip in the ground about ten feet off the path and slightly hidden from it by a hedge of bushes and low underbrush. It was private without being isolated.

As they set up their tents, Heero was surprised to see that Relena didn't need any help, although she let him check her setup, more to humor him than anything else. Duo snickered behind him and got a glare in return.

"Heero why do you keep doing that?"

"What?"

"Glaring at Duo like that. You know it doesn't affect him in the least."

"Hope springs eternal."

Relena blinked once. Poetic references from Heero seemed slightly out of character.

"I listen to Wufei from time to time. I'm not completely ignorant of poetry."

Relena smiled at Heero. "Sorry."

"Hn."

Relena just rolled her eyes and went back to setting up her sleeping bag.

Duo finished setting up his tent and went to inspect the fire pit. It was made of natural stone and dug down below the level of the ground. It was in excellent condition and already had wood out for their fire, which Duo set alight at once in order to allow it to burn down to coals.

Xxxxxxxxx

"Relena. You can't eat that."

Relena stopped with a bratt half way to her mouth. "Why not?"

Duo laughed at her. "It's not cooked. You won't like it raw."

"But it's . . .like. . . smoked or something. I can smell it."

Heero handed Relena a long handled fork with a bratt already on it.

"You cook them over the open flames. They're good. Duo will dress it for you."

Relena watched for a moment as Heero and Duo roasted their bratts over the fire. She'd had grilled hot dogs of course, but never cooked one over an open fire herself.

"This is fun. What do we have to put on them?"

Duo smiled happily. "We have mustard, ketchup, pickle relish, kraut, and chopped onions."

Heero helped himself to a bun and proceeded to put everything on his bratt. He wasn't about to ask Duo where he got all the 'fixins'. The explanation was bound to be long drawn out and way more information that he was interested in. Suffice it to say he was happy to have what Duo had provided.

"Here . . . let me fix that for you. You want . . . mustard, relish and kraut right?"

Relena smiled at Duo. He'd remembered!

"That's right. Here, I think I've cremated it sufficiently." Relena let Duo take the fork from her and stuff the bratt into a bun, along with all her 'fixins'. "Thanks."

" 'is is 'ood!". Relena mumbled around a mouthful." 'S 'elly 'ummy."

Heero nearly fell off the log he was sitting on. Relena was talking with her mouth full.

"Relena Maria . . . "

Relena swallowed quickly.

"Duo! Do _not_ call me that horrible long string of names."

Duo raised his eyebrow.

"I was named after all eight of my great-grandmothers. It's terrible. When I have to sign my full name, I get writers cramp. . . and I'll talk with my mouth full if I want."

They spent the next few minutes roasting and eating bratts. Heero reached into the soft side cooler and handed Duo a bottle of beer, then opened another and handed it to Relena. She raised an eyebrow at Heero who shrugged

"I like cold beer. Hot reminds me too much of the war. Everything we drank was either room temperature or hot."

Duo shuddered dramatically. "Yeah and I still get the crawlies when I smell that nutri drink. God that stuff was awful."

Heero snickered at Duo, the long running conflict between him and Wufei was a standing joke. Wufei had drunk a soy-protein-powder based smoothie every morning for months. Duo hated the stuff with a passion and couldn't tell why, just that it smelled 'nasty.'

"Yeah? Like it's different from that shit you still drink."

"Well it is. Mine has bananas in it and no protein powder. Vitamins, that's the difference."

Heero just made a face, it all smelled the same to him.

Relena suddenly let out a squeal. "Ohh! Duo . . . ugh . . . a bat."

She practically dove into Heero's arms. He obligingly gathered her into his arms and covered her head with his hands.

"Relena, what?" Duo couldn't believe Relena was scared of a bat. "What's wrong? I won't bite you."

"No, but it'll get caught in my hair. Ugh."

"Relena! Die Fledermaus won't either. That's a common misconception. The bat's radar will keep it from getting caught. They'll actually turn in mid air to avoid it."

"Nooo . . . Duo. My nurse always said that it would."

Duo laughed at Relena and proved his point by unbraiding his hair and with quick tosses of his head he did his best to catch the bat in his hair. It didn't work, the bat avoided the mass easily. In fact the poor thing finally flew off in disgust. His attempts to catch the insects attracted to their fire thwarted by Duo's antics.

Relena sat watching and laughing. If Duo couldn't catch the bat in his hair, she was sure it wouldn't accidentally get caught in hers. She patted Heero's arm absently murmuring 'Thanks 'Ro' Heero smiled at Duo and motioned him to come over and sit on the log beside him. He produced a brush from somewhere and started brushing the tangles out of Duo's hair.

"What kind of shampoo do you use, Duo? Your hair is always so nice. It's just not fair. I have two hairdressers and use some of the most expensive shampoos on the market and I've still got split ends."

"Well, for one, don't use hot rollers or curling irons. Dries the ends. And use a camomile rinse. It'll make your blond brighter without brassy highlights. I use a really good quality shampoo, not the most expensive. Check yours. I bet it's based on animal fat. Not good. You want to use something based on glycerin. And for gods' sake ditch that braid thing please. It's so last century."

Relena sighed. "I ditched it except for casual wear. It keeps the short ends out of my face."

Heero grunted "That's what that bandana is for. Those braids make you look ten." He efficiently braided Duo's hair and wound an elastic around it. "And stop using rubber bands out of your desk on your hair. Breaks the strands. More split ends." At Relena's astonished look he snickered softly. "What? You don't have a lover with hair like Duo's and not learn something. I even use real shampoo and conditioner now."

"Yeah, instead of lye soap. God!" Duo shuddered dramatically, kissed Heero and suggested that they all go to bed as they were getting up early to start their climb.

Relena bopped Heero on the head and snarled "Omae o korosu, Baka" but her smile was affectionate.

Duo laughed at her accent and gripped. "Hands off the goods, woman."

The all laughed and put out the fire with Relena stirring, Duo pouring water and Heero side walk superintending, and went off to bed.

Xxxx

Next morning they all crawled out of their respective tents grumbling (Duo), silent (Heero) or stiff (Relena). Heero started coffee and Duo began the task of checking their lines. As Relena checked the rest of their equipment, Duo went over every inch of their climbing ropes.

Relena poured coffee and brought it to him. Heero began rebundling the ropes, carefully coiling them and wrapping them into neat, easy to pack bundles. Duo stopped long enough to sip at the coffee.

"Aaahhh! Just the way I like it. Relena, you remembered."

"Duo, I can remember how over four hundred diplomats or their wives like their tea. I'm surely going to remember how you like your coffee."

Duo grinned at her slightly indignant face. "Yeah. But they're important people. I'm just . . ."

"Heero, grab him!" Relena dived for one of Duo's arms and Heero grabbed the other. Duo instinctively fought back but Heero held him with little effort and Relena tickled Duo mercilessly. "I've been threatening you for ever. Quite calling yourself names."

"Relly, Relly . . . Heero, please. I give, I give . . . I'll be good, no more . . . Help. Uncle, Aunties, and all my cousins."

Duo laughed and struggled against Heero's grip. Heero was careful not to clamp down on Duo too hard so it didn't hurt him, but Duo was helpless in his grip

Relena stopped tickling Duo and Heero loosened his clutch. Duo wriggled around and kissed Heero on the cheek. Heero adjusted his grip and pulled Duo to his chest, they spent a little while kissing and cuddling. Relena found that she didn't mind. Well, she did but, not in a jealous way. She just wanted what they had. Someone who loved her for herself. She shook her head, shaking off the sadness.

"Ok you two, break it up. Examine each others tonsils some other time. Breakfast is up."

Relena carefully lifted the pot off the edge of the fire and used a fork to lift the lid. "See? I remembered, Duo. I didn't burn my fingers. Ouch!" Relena stuck her scorched finger in her mouth.

Heero took the pot from her and set it aside. When he turned back to examine her burn, he found that Duo was already doing that, so he dished up the porridge

"Status!" Heero handed Relena a bowl of porridge with caned milk. Relena twitched, she'd heard him use that word before, but only when one of the pilots had been injured.

"First degree burn to middle finger, left hand, nothing. Status: operational. And damn pretty this early in the morning."

Duo collected his bowl and poked at the cloth Relena had used as a pot holder. It had a thin spot in it that matched her burned finger.

Heero sat back wit his own breakfast. "Good. Don't want to spoil the climb. Eat up and we'll get started. It's about an hour hike to the site. We'll start our climb after we rest and have lunch. I want to look the whole climb over through my binoculars before we start it."

They finished eating and cleaned up their dishes and camp site. Duo reminded them that they had to go to the main office and file a hiking plan. Heero got out a clean copy of their map and drew their proposed hiking route on it and marked where they planned to spend the next night. They turned it in at the office and headed out.

Relena, true to her word, kept up quite well and they spent part of the hike bird watching. Relena was the lucky one to site a golden eagle first. It was an impressive bird with a seven-foot wing span.

"Look, it's a female. Isn't she wonderful?"

"Yeah, unless you get too close to the nest, then you're in real trouble." Heero watched the eagle, admiring its handling of the up draft.

"Yeah, a mobile doll attack with feathers. They'll do anything to protect the nest, especially with eggs or chicks."

"Have the eggs hatched yet?" Duo squinched up his nose. The idea of disturbing a nest bothered him.

"Not a clue. But let's not take chances. Ok?"

"Ok. I mean, how would you like it if someone barged into your living room?" Relena shuddered at the mental picture.

The hike took a little longer than they'd anticipated as Relena got caught up in bird watching and spent some time scuffing through her book and marking all the birds that they saw. She was more excited over a pine siskin or a tern than she was over diamonds.

When they got to the clearing where Heero wanted to set up camp they were told by a park ranger that they weren't allowed to camp there. They would have to make their climb and be back down again in time to hike to an approved camp site.

"It is no more than an hours hike. It is very nice, a little . . . what you might call a bungalow. There are beds for twelve. This is not a good place to camp. The winds at night will blow all but the best and most heavily staked out tent away. It is too cold to sleep out in the open in these altitudes."

Relena sighed, watched the ranger walk away and then kicked a rock. "Damnit! I wanted to use my camping gear. I brought a bunch of stuff that it looks like I'm not gonna get a chance to use. Shit."

Heero looked at Relena and felt bad. He and Duo wanted her to have a good time. She was looking a lot better but little things bothered her more than they ought.

"Well it can't be helped. Relena, why don't you give me your extra camping stuff. I'll put it in my pack. That'll lighten yours some."

"Oh, Heero there's not that much. Just my tent and sleeping bag. They're both that new micro stuff. They don't weigh a pound between them and they scrunch down into such a small package that it's no trouble. If you want to lighten my load take some of this dried stuff. I've got a load of trail mix and reconstitutable dinners."

Heero and Duo both went through Relena's pack for the third or fourth time. Relena realized that as the situation changed they went through all the packs and rearranged things so that what they might need was on the top or near to it.

This time they shuffled camping gear to the bottom and food and water to the top, along with jackets and climbing equipment.

"We can't carry these packs while we climb, what are we going to do with them."

Heero grunted and lifted Relena's pack, it wasn't heavy, so Relena wasn't sure exactly what he was up to until he grumbled. "You going to shoulder this or not." Then she realized that until now he'd been letting her shoulder her pack by her self, helping Duo with his instead.

Now he was helping her while Duo went on ahead.

"I still want to know what we're giong to do with the packs."

Heero gave her a funny look then ducked his head. "Damn."

"What?"

"I forgot that you wouldn't know. We'll make a cache, a hidden place and stow everything we're not going to use on the climb in it. That's what Duo went ahead to do. I can't believe I forgot you wouldn't know."

"That's ok, Heero." Relena grinned at him like a school girl. "That's great."

Heero grinned back a bit confused. "Great? I forgot. . . "

"Yeah, you forgot. You expected me to know something that any other of your friends would know. Yay, me."

Heero gave Relena a slightly puzzled look, shrugged, then led the way to the cache. It was easy to find Duo his hair glowed a bright cinnamon honey it the sunlight.

Duo had stacked up a carn of rocks and put his pack into it. He had kept his climbing gear out and was going over it again while he waited. Heero dumped his pack and dug out his gear, then helped Relena do the same. They cached their packs and finished piling the rocks on them.

"That's not very hidden. Why bother at all?"

"It keeps animals out and wind from blowing stuff. I don't think the winds get strong enough to blow the packs away, but why take chances."

"Ok. That make's sense. Look, I want to take some of this stuff. I'm a nervous nelly, but I don't think I can handle all this stuff during a climb."

Duo examined the stuff she was carrying. She had some odd stuff, at least for them. There was a tube of lip gloss that made him grin but she also had a small first aid kit that was really complete.

"No high pressure dressings?"

"No, but I have a blow up all purpose cast."

Duo snickered. "All purpose? Or lower limb specific?"

"All purpose, you ass."

"Won't fit that.."

Relena gave up. When it came to smart answers, Duo had her beat hands down.

Then she got a demonstration of why they had been and still were so good at what they do. Heero checked Duo's gear, Duo checked her gear and she checked Heero's. Then Duo checked every thing with Heero cross checking it all. She got dizzy at how fast they were.

"Ok, all checked and double checked. Let's go."

Relena eyed the rock face. The face Heero had chosen was more or less vertical but it had plenty of finger and toe holds and cracks that could be used for their anchors. When they reached the top it was going to be nice to be able to belay and rappel back down. She smiled to herself. An hour climb, maybe more for a two-second rappel. Although she was well aware that the rappel wasn't the point of the climb.

"Who's going to belay?" Heero eyed the face and calculated the amount of rope needed to make the climb

"Belay?"

"Yes. Who's going to belay? I can handle both of you but I . . ."

Relena gave Heero a pitying look. She hated to do this to him.

"Umm . . . I don't know about you but I'm free climbing. You can argue with Duo about who's belaying who."

Duo gave Relena one sharp look and then turned his head, but his shoulders shook.

Heero growled for a second, then sighed. He wasn't going to argue with Relena he just started checking his equipment and hers again

"You always do that. Why?"

"Do what?"

"You check equipment when you're upset."

Duo took the cam from Heero's hand, he sighed and turned to Duo. Wrapping his hand around the back of Duo's neck, he pressed his forehead to his lovers. "Stralende Augen, I don't like this. She's not strong enough to do this."

"Heero don't. She's stronger than you know. She can do this. Stop treating her like a queen and start treating her like a friend. You wouldn't do that to say Sally."

"God no" Heero shivered slightly. He'd cosseted Sally once, she'd nearly frozen his balls off. "Ok, Duo you're right. She's a big girl and she can make her own decisions. We'll all free climb."

Relena relaxed, she really didn't want to get into a fight with Heero, but she was going to climb free or she was going to throw one of the biggest fits of her life.

So they started the climb. Heero led out and Duo brought up the rear. Not that he could do much if Relena got into real trouble, but it made Heero feel better. They made their way up the wall with careful precision. Relena checked each finger and toe hold carefully, she wasn't going to be the one to fall. Duo watched her for the first part of the climb then, reassured that she was as good on natural rock as she was on the wall in the training room, he payed attention to his own climb. He only checked on her when she dropped pebbles on him, which wasn't often.

Heero nearly drove himself crazy trying to keep an eye on Relena and another one on Duo. That didn't leave an eye for himself and Relena finally called him on it. She managed to pull herself up within two feet of him and get in his face.

"Yuy, if you don't quit that you'll fall and then I'll flatten what is left of you. You pay attention to your climb and let me take care of mine. And if Duo can't manage for himself, I'll see to it that he is retired. Get over yourself, you've already saved the world."

Heero gave Relena a shamefaced look. He knew better than to try to watch everyone at once. He nodded and started to climb again.

"Hey! At least you could grunt so I know you heard me."

"Hn."

Relena wanted to throw something at him but she was too busy hanging by the fingertips of one hand and the tips of her toes while she tried to reach the next finger hold. She managed with a bit of a stretch and continued her climb.

Duo grinned to himself at Relena dressing Heero down. He seemed to intimidate her slightly or at least he did. This last 'conversation' proved she was rapidly getting over it.

It took them two hours to make the climb, but only because Heero insisted that they unpack their slings and rest half way up. Duo at rest was Duo hungry so they ate, hanging off the face of the wall, sitting in slings attached to the rock with cams and crampons.

The rest of the climb was harder as the easy holds got fewer and farther between, some of the holds available were not what Heero would have allowed Relena to try if he'd had anything to say about it. But Relena and Duo were right, he had to stand back and allow her to do things. Duo's voice rang in his memory 'If you were her boyfriend you still should let her do things. You can't wrap her up in cotton wool for the rest of her life. Let her grow up. That's the whole point of it, isn't it?'

Heero agreed with Duo, but he didn't have to like it. He wanted to wrap them both up and protect them from everything that could possibly hurt them. But anyone too tightly held wasn't being protected, they were being suffocated. He knew that quite well.

Heero reached the top first, with Relena right behind him. Duo was only a few seconds behind her and only because he'd followed her rather than pick his own holds.

"Wow, that was great. I love it. Look, you can see forever. Oh my, and the breeze."

Relena tugged her bandana off and shook out her sweaty hair. She's just twisted it into a knot that morning and bundled it under her bandana to keep it off her neck and shoulders. Duo sat next to her and looked out over the panoramic view spread before them.

"Relly . . . look. If you look that way, you can look down on the eagles. See, there's a nest."

Heero came to stand behind Duo and look at the view. He was fascinated by the eagles, he wished he could get a closer look, somehow binocs weren't the same. They sat and ate fresh food. Relena had sandwiches and fresh fruit in her fanny pack which she handed around with a satisfied air. Finally, after two hours of picture taking and eagle watching, Heero started picking up the pace.

"We better get going if we're going to get to the bottom in time to get to the cottage for the night."

Relena sighed, took one final picture with her tiny digital camera and turned to watch Heero set the anchors for the belay.

"One at a time or all together?" Duo leaned over the edge to examine the face.

"One at a time. I don't want to take the chance of someone hitting the face. This is the best place for a rappel. But the corridor is narrow and the rock is wonky"

"Ok, who's first?"

"Me."

Relena vowed she was going to get Heero to start using sentences of more than four words if it killed her.

Heero took out a bundle of rope and handed it to Duo. "Here, lay this out. I'm going to check the edge. We may want to put a pad down."

"Depends on whether the rope rubs on the edge or not."

Relena fished a pad out of her pack. "I'd rather you used it. Doesn't hurt to be careful.

"Thanks. Relly. You're right." Duo handed the pad to heero. "Here. Want me to set the anchors?"

"No, I'll do it. You shake out the rope and drop it."

Heero set two anchors and tested them, while Duo dropped the rope over the edge and prepared it for the rappel.

Things went well at first, Heero got into his harness and walked backwards over the edge. No one noticed that the smooth edge where they had dropped the rope had suddenly spalled off into a sharp edge that was slicing the pad and the rope.

Heero stopped half way down to check his decent path, trying to make sure that neither Relena nor Duo would have problems. He leaned out to get a better look and suddenly the rope snapped, cut through by the sharp edge of rock.

He fell twenty feet and landed flat on his back, bounced once, and lay still. Duo swore and started harnessing up.

"Relena. I want you to hand belay me. I don't want to have to trust that face not to spall again and cut my rope. Put on your gloves and hurry."

Relena didn't argue, she'd done this at the academy and she knew what she was doing. She belayed Duo's rappel. Then she started climbing down by hand. She didn't trust the rock either.

By the time she got down Duo had already checked Heero over.

Relena gulped then said softly, "Status?"

"He's got a knot on his head and he's semi conscious. That ankle is definitely broken. Relena, go get all the packs. Don't carry more than you can manage. Make two or three trips if you have to. I don't want to leave Heero. Hurry. No! Wait! What do you have in your med. kit?"

"I have . . . well, here." Relena rummaged the kit out of her fanny pack and handed it over to Duo. He opened it and started working on Heero. He carefully checked again for any signs of a broken back, modern medicine being what it was, that wasn't as bad as it could have been even half a century ago, but the recovery wasn't fun

Relena headed for the cache without argument. She wasn't trained in first aid and she wouldn't have asked Duo to leave Heero anyway.

She opened one pack and just jammed every thing she could into another. Then she dumped the remainder in the third, reducing the number of packs she had to manage. She tried to carry both, but it was too heavy. She left one where it was and returned to Duo and Heero, dropping the pack at Duo's side she went back for the other. Finally she dropped to her knees by Duo, gasping for air.

"How is he? Is it really bad Duo? Oh . . . Duo."

Duo had checked Heero over more thoroughly while Relena was getting the packs. Now he sighed and took Heero's hand in his own.

"He's concussed. Broken ankle. Bruises, contusions, and abrasions. Back's ok. We need med evac."

Duo stopped for a moment, he hated to see Heero unconscious, it was just about more than he could take. This wasn't a mission, it was a vacation.

"Duo . . . break down later. Get it together."

"Yeah, I know . . . I'm ok. Just. . . shit. Where's the radio."

"Heero had it."

"Fuck! . . . where's his fanny pack? He would have had it in there."

Duo carefully rolled Heero just enough that Relena could get her hands under him and feel for the fanny pack.

"Got it. But . . . " Relena unzipped the pack and hunted for the radio. "Shit. Mother fuck. It's broken." Relena showed Duo the radio. Its case was cracked and the squashed water bottle had soaked its circuitry, shorting the battery. The little LCD screen was unreadable.

Duo grabbed his pack and searched for his GPS, it had an emergency beeper in it. "Relena where's your emergency call mod."

Relena dug that out, but it wasn't getting any signal, Duo's GPS wasn't either.

"What's going on? They both have satellite up links."

"Relena, I don't have a clue. We don't have the time to sit here scratching our asses and wondering about it. I've got to decide what to do and fast. It's getting dark in less than three hours."

Relena looked at Heero then Duo.

"You know exactly what you have to do. Heero needs pick up. We need to get out of here. I can walk out, so can you. But there's no way we can carry Heero out and he's not walking on that ankle, no matter what he says."

"I can walk." Heero started trying to get up. But a wave of dizziness made him lay back down quickly "Just give me a few minutes."

Relena just leaned over held up a hand and said. "How many fingers." She held her clenched fist in front of his face.

"Two."

"None. 'Ro, don't even say it. I'll make Duo tie you up and I'll sit on you. You're not trying to walk out. And that's that."

Duo blinked. Relena really meant business.

"What are we going to do? You can't stay out here at night. Duo . . . "

"Shut up, Heero. She's right. I've got to walk out and get help. I'll go to that bungalow the ranger told me about. There's bound to be someone there who can help me carry you out."

Duo rummage the packs and dug out Relena's tent, two sleeping bags and, at Relena's suggestion, all three ground cloths.

"Damnit Heero, if you didn't use a mummy there'd be three sleeping bags and I could get another layer between you and the ground."

Relena took exception to that, nearly snarling. "Duo I don't care if it's soft. Get going. Don't spend anymore time here. I can set this up myself. Go."

Duo shook his head, "Insulation between you and cold ground."

Relena nodded. "Ok. Sorry. Better get going."

"Ok I'm headin' out. Ask Heero any questions you have. Take everything into the tent. I've got some heaters in my pack, use them."

"Ok, Go on! Go!"

Duo took the time to talk with Heero for a few seconds. Heero clutched at his shirt, then let him go as Duo snarled, "Will not. She's stayin' right here. She'll slow me up. It's already starting to get dark. And you can't be alone. You'll go to sleep. Shut up about it. Bye. Love you." He gave Heero one last lingering kiss, picked up his fanny pack, stuffed a few things into it and left at a hard trot.

Relena sorted through the things that Duo had dumped on the ground and started setting up camp, grumbling, "Where's a park ranger when you need one?"

"In his nice warm station."

"Heero? You holding out ok?"

"Yeah . . . head hurts . . . concussion. Ankle hurts. Various other aches and pains. I'll be ok. How are you?"

"Pissed. Damnit. How can . . . shit . . . I."

Relena kicked a rock and spent a few minutes giving Heero an inventory of all the swear words she knew. Then she went back to setting up camp. She finished sorting through all the things they had in both packs.

"Heero! Do _not_ go to sleep."

"Huh."

"Sleep. No."

"Ok."

Relena inventoried everything and realized that they were fairly well off. Her tent was easier to set up but Heero had been carrying a really good two person tent. There were three ground cloths and three sleeping bags. And, she was delighted to find, two candle lanterns, some glow stix and plenty of food and water.

"Heero. Why don't I put up the bigger tent? It'd give us more room. Oh shit . . . damn it."

Relena turned holding the much maligned all purpose blow up cast. Heero sighed, the thing was worth using, just to immobilize the break. So he allowed Relena to carefully maneuver his leg onto the cast, zip it closed, and blow it up.

"There . . . I can't believe Duo forgot it . . . I can't believe I forgot. Damn. I'm losing my mind."

Heero shifted uncomfortably. He been hurt worse, but one thing Sally Po had been telling him seemed to be true. Without the adrenalin overload of a mission, he was really starting to hurt.

"Relena, you better get the tent set up soon. I'm getting really stiff. Set up your little tent. Not the bigger one."

"Why?"

"The smaller tent will get warmer from our body heat."

"Ok. Oh, . . . I've got two candle lanterns and . . ." Relena counted. "A dozen candles. That'll help keep the tent warmer. "

Relena set up the little tent and, at Heero's insistence, tried to double stake it. The ground was hard and driving the stakes was too hard for her, so Heero did it. She watched him as he crawled around the tent and drove the stakes. He tried to hide his pain but by the time he was finished the sweat on his forehead proved to her that he was in a bad way.

She crawled into the tent, got all three ground cloths down and doubled the sleeping bags, zipping them together to make one bigger one.

Then she helped Heero crawl into the tent and sleeping bags. She carefully took off his boots and then hers. She'd made sure that the packs were with in arms reach before she got into the tent, so she easily maneuvered them both into the tent and sat at the zipped door watching Heero as he struggled to get comfortable.

"Is there anything I can do for you? There's some pain killers here but I'm not sure you should take them with a concussion."

"If they don't have opiates in them, they're ok. But I'll have to take a bunch."

Relena read the instructions. "It says not to take more than six in twenty four hours. I don't think . . ."

"Relena, give me the damn bottle. I'll take my chances with an upset stomach."

Heero took two pills and swallowed them with a gulp of water and a grimace. Moving his head around hurt.

"I could have walked out. It's not that bad."

"Liar. If you could have walked out, Duo would have let you. Don't give me any shit. We're both too old for that iron man crap. You're hurt, just admit it. If this was a mission, it would be different. There'd be a reason to keep going. But this is supposed to be a vacation. So just lay there and let me take care of you . . . please?"

Heero gave up. He really did feel bad. And Relena was right, if there was a good reason to keep on he could do it. But there wasn't a good reason so he just let go, for the first time in his life.

"Relena, is there any soup? I could use something warm in my stomach."

Relena found the dehydrated soup mix and eyed the warmer attached to it with some trepidation. She had no idea how to use the thing and she was worried about setting the tent on fire and Heero was looking worse by the minute.

"Heero, don't go to sleep. Damn! HEERO!"

"Huh? Uuunnn. Relena. I nearly went to sleep, didn't I."

"Yes. How does this thing work?"

Heero told her how to mix the soup and stick the heater to the outside of the cup. Relena managed to get it done in the confines of the tent and was rather proud that she didn't spill the soup, step on Heero, or fall on him. In fact, she felt she had managed quite well.

Heero smiled his thanks and sipped at the soup. While he was drinking the broth, Relena got out a spoon and handed it to him. Then she started on her own meal. There was a thing in a pouch that Heero called an MREG20.

It was, she found, a wonderful thing. The bag had chicken and rice in a pouch. In another pouch, labeled accessary pac, was a package of crackers and a small packet containing some yellow stuff labeled imitation cheese food spread, a tiny bottle of soy sauce, and another of hot sauce. There was a flat folded up something that Heero told her was toilet paper, it was awfully slick. And, to her delight, a package of hot chocolate powder. There was also a sardine tin, but it was stamped cinnamon applesauce. The utensil made her laugh

"What the hell is this thing."

Heero was heavy eyed but glad Relena was keeping up a line of chatter clearly intended to keep him awake.

"That delightful object is called a spork. It's a combination of a spoon and a fork. It's even serrated on one side so you can cut with it."

"Yeah sure. The minute I put any pressure on it at all, it'll break. I've got my knife. It has a fork on it and a real knife, but I don't think I'll need it for chicken and rice."

"The rip tabs are only on the two outer bags. Try to open the entree with your teeth and you'll lose one."

Relena snickered.

"I suppose you know all about these things. I. . . . um . . . here. Do you want more soup?"

"Yes, and don't worry. If you get too personal or too close to uncomfortable, I'll tell you. I'm getting better at personal relations. Duo nags . . . a lot."

Relena made more soup and smiled at Heero. She'd noticed that he was getting a lot better at conversation. Even if his sentences did tend to stay in the three to five word range unless he was issuing orders, or explaining to her why she shouldn't do something.

"Heh. Good for him."

"Thanks for the soup. . . . ummm . . . Relena? I need to . . . and . . . " Heero turned a shade of red that clashed badly with his jumper.

"What do you need? Heero, if you don't talk to me, I can't help you . . . do _not_ get up. You'll make that ankle worse. You know you're going to be in regen for at least six weeks. If you _really_ mess that up, you'll be in a full cast instead of a portable. Down . . . now."

"Relena, I have to go . . . out . . . I mean . . . I . . ."

"Just spit it out, you need to pee." Relena rummaged around in her discarded stuff and got out an empty water bottle. She quickly cut the top off and handed it to Heero. Then she unzipped the door and crawled out. When Heero had finished his business he hesitantly gave her the bottle which she emptied, crawling several feet away from the tent and down hill as well as down wind.

"There. That wasn't so hard, was it." Heero shrugged and she could tell he was struggling to contain his embarrassment. "Look I stayed with Duo and I had to do a lot more for him than empty a bottle. He was in restraints if you remember."

Heero groaned, he'd forgotten about that, sort of.

"You ok? I don't like the sound of that groan. You're not going to get sick are you?"

"No. I just have nightmares about you and Duo. If I'd known . . ."

"Heero, we're friends now. That was the best thing to happen to me in a long time. We had fun. Now, if you're not going to get sick, would you like to try to eat something solid?"

"No. That soup was a chance. With this concussion I better not."

"You don't seem like I thought . . . I mean . . . well. Damnit."

"I'm concussed. Right now I'm fairly good. But I can feel myself starting to drift. I'll be ok for a while, then I'll drift off. Get confused. Maybe you should tie me up. I might hurt you or something."

"Ugh . . . not a chance. One, Duo will kill me for indulging in kinky bondage fun with his lover; and two, I don't have the slightest idea of how to go about it and I'm not following _your_ instructions on how to tie _you_ up. That's just too" Relena shuddered dramatically. "weird for words. So . . . no way . . . nu un . . . eeewww and forget it."

Heero sighed and rubbed irritably at his head. It hurt and he was feeling slightly queasy. He lay down on his side and curled up, trying to be careful of his ankle. Relena took off her belt and crawled closer to Heero, she was beginning to get a little cold. The sun was almost down and the wind was picking up. What warmth they were generating was being blown away.

"Heero, I need to light the lamp. Do you have any matches? That's one of the few things I didn't bring."

"In the MRE. Rolled up in the tee-paper."

Relena gave Heero a sharp look. But he was watching her with bleary eyes so she carefully lit the lantern and hung it from the loop in the top of the tent. Its golden glow made the tent seem warmer already.

"Relena? We're going to have to share the bag the way you set it up. If you want, I'll help you unzip them. You don't . . ."

" . . . want to freeze to death, thank you very much. I'm going to get in that bag with you and we are going to keep each other warm. And that's all. I gave up on more a long time ago. But I'm going to hold you and keep you warm and you are going to let me. So shut up and roll over so I don't kick your leg."

Relena slid into the bag behind Heero and settled them as comfortably as she could. Heero protested a little but she told him to shut up again and he gave in.

Xxxx

Duo headed down the trail, he wasn't too worried about Heero, Relena would take the best care of him she could. Heero wasn't too badly hurt, but the concussion worried him a little. They needed to get him to the hospital as soon as possible, even though none of his injuries were life threatening, just painful.

The trail was rougher than Duo had thought it would be. He was making good time. He'd been hoping that the bungalow was closer than the ranger had implied, knowing rangers, he might have underestimated their abilities. In this case he was wrong.

He trotted for over two hours and still didn't see any lights. He knew that there would be lights on at the bungalow until at least 10:00 p.m. No one would go to bed much before that.

When he finally saw the bungalow, he snarled wordlessly. There was only a small light over the door. There was no one else there.

It was an honor system camp. You used it and were supposed to leave it the way you found it. Surprisingly it worked quite well. But it wasn't much help to Duo. He just hoped that there was some form of communication here.

He entered the small structure and turned on the lights. There was only one room which contained four triple bunk beds and a table long enough for benches to hold approximately twelve people. There was a stove and sink on one wall and not much else. Including, no telephone, vid phone, or radio. He found a note from the ranger, obviously for them.

'Use as much wood as you need. Please clean after yourselves. Unfortunately the satellite that covers this area will be down for the next eighteen hours. (Present time 5:00 p.m.) if you need anything you'll have to hike out for it. I'm sorry for any inconvenience.

Park Ranger Otto Strom.'

There was no way to get in touch with anyone, he couldn't even call Relena and Heero and tell them what was going on.

Duo sighed, dug a map out of his fanny pack and studied it. He picked his route and marked it carefully with a wax pencil, folded the map so that his marks were visible, and tucked it into the map holder.

It was almost six miles to the main ranger station. It was dark and the terrain was less than optimal, to say the least. But he didn't want to wait until morning. That would mean leaving Relena and an injured Heero on the mountain until at least noon the next day. If he made it to the main ranger station by midnight they could start in at first light and be there by eight or earlier.

Xxxx

Heero shifted uncomfortably and grumbled.

"What?" Relena had dozed off but Heero had managed to keep himself awake. "Damnit Heero, I'm supposed to be keeping you awake."

"I'm fine for now. If I start drifting, I'll wake you again. I can't see my watch, what time is it?"

"Nearly 10:00 p.m. we aren't getting off this mountain tonight are we?"

"Don't think so. Duo must have run into some kind of trouble."

"Like?"

"Probably the bungalow is empty. No one there. And probably no radio either. I wonder what's wrong with his emergency signal on the GPS It. should have worked. "

"I don't know. Why are you asking me? I don't know any thing about that kind of thing."

"Making conversation. To keep awake. You don't want to talk? Usualy you're nagging me to talk"

Relena laughed. "Ok, so I'm fickle. Do you know which satellite it is? I know that the maintenance schedule for the satellites was changed last month. So maybe its off line?"

"That's a possibility especially since your panic button didn't work . . . damn, I'm cold. I usualy don't get cold."

"Here." Relena tugged the top sleeping bag and tried to get it tucked around them better. "Heero, lift your butt. You're pining the edge with your hip."

Heero lifted and Relena dragged the bag around until she could wrap it around them better. Heero carefully rolled over onto the other side and tucked Relena into the curve of his body, but she poked and tugged until they were the other way around with Heero on the inside again

"You should let me . . ."

"You should shut up. I've dreamed of this for years . . . " Heero snorted softly. "Not you being hurt, stupid. But me being able to hold you. Give you comfort. You're very hard to . . . cuddle."

"Perfect Soldiers aren't cuddly. I'm supposed to take care of you. Not the other way around." Heero shifted to try to get his pants straightened around they were twisted around his body in a very uncomfortable way.

"Stop squirming, it . . . what's wrong?"

"Pants are twisted. It's not very comfortable."

Relena reared up and fixed it for Heero. She got hold of his waist band and simply lifted him unpinning the pants and untwisting them at the same time.

"That better?"

Heero eyed her for a second, then just nodded. "Yeah, thanks. . . .you're a lot stronger than I thought you'd be."

"You should check my evaluation. I get one every two weeks, just like any trainee. I'm enrolled as Regina Craft. Duo did it. I think everyone knows who I really am, but it gives me some time to work out and decompress a little. It's been very good for me. I feel much better physically and I've put on a lot of muscle. As you noticed."

Relena lay back down and pulled an unresisting Heero into her arms again. This was good. She hated it that Heero was hurt, but she got to hold him in her arms, a thing that she' never thought possible. She didn't have any illusions about what was going on, she was happy just to get to hold him.

"Relena?"

"Hn?"

"Oh lord. I rubbed off on you." Heero snickered softly. "Oh . . . ow. That hurt."

"Then don't do it. You need something. What do you need?"

Relena rested her head on Heero's back and waited for him to tell her what he wanted.

"Thanks. I mean, . . . for being nice to Duo. I really appreciate it."

"Shit. No thanks needed. I should thank you. When I finally got over being a silly girl, then a jealous bitch, I found that it was driving a wedge between you and me. So I was trying to find a way to make up to Duo. Then you asked me to take care of him and I found out that he's truly a fascinating person. So . . . yeah . . . thank_ you_. And you're welcome."

Heero yawned, settled himself more comfortably. "Thas' good. Go to sleep. 'S ok now."

"You sure? Heero! Wake up!"

"No. Said 's ok." Heero mumbled some more assurances and Relena gave up, if he was that determined to go to sleep, it was going to have to be ok. She made a mental note to take emergency medical training as soon as possible, then went to sleep. With her arms wrapped firmly around Heero.

Xxxx

Duo made very good time and arrived at the main station at midnight. He leaned on the desk for a second trying to get his thoughts together.

"Hello? Anyone here?"

Duo waited impatiently he hoped the main station was manned all night. But at a park like this one it might not be but if it wasn't why wasn't the door locked.

"Yes. Sprekenzie Duitch?"

"Ja."

"How may I help you? Would you like to eat with us?"

Duo's tired brain did a double take and all he could do was gape at the ranger for a second.

"We are having a small snack in the back. Would you like to eat?"

"No. There's an emergency. My friend fell off the face at 1136."

"Ach! This is not good. How bad is it? When did it happen?"

"He's not too bad." Duo filled the man in on Heero's injuries ending, "It happened at about five. The mountains fooled me. I forgot how quickly it gets dark."

"What do you expect us to do this late at night?" The ranger held up his hand as Duo started to speak. "You must understand that there isn't much we can do in the dark."

"I know. I don't expect you to start out right now. My friends are ok. We had planned to camp out, so we have tents and sleeping bags with us. So they are warm and dry. I just want you to start making arrangements so we can go up at first light."

"Ah. Yes." The ranger gave Duo a stern look "You have experience in this?"

Duo nodded fished his real ID out of his pack and showed it to the ranger. "May I ask your name?"

"Yes. It's Otto Strom. I left a note in the chalet." Herr Strom examined the papers with quick efficiency. "You are a Preventer? You're very young. Why does your name seem familiar?"

Duo winced slightly, "Yes, I'm a Preventer. You recognize my name because I was a Gundam Pilot." He waited for some reaction. But Otto just nodded and handed him back his papers.

"You come into the back. You need to get some clothes on and have something warm. You're shivering. It wouldn't do for you to get sick."

Duo suddenly realized that he only had on shorts, a t-shirt and his climbing shoes. The trip to the station had kept him warm but now the sweat was drying on his skin and he was getting cold.

"Ok. Thank you. I'll be glad of some coffee, please."

Otto got Duo seated at the table, wrapped him in a blanket and poured him coffee, all the while explaining the situation to the two other rangers sitting at the table. Duo was glad to turn things over to the older man. He was exhausted.

"Eat. I know it is very pretty but you eat it."

Duo realized that one of the other rangers had put a plate of noodles and chicken in front of him and he'd been sitting there staring at it absently.

"Yes, of course. Thank you. I'm afraid I was worrying about my friends."

The gentle pat on the back nearly undid Duo. He gulped and took a sip of coffee then, at the rangers prodding, he started on his dinner.

Otto came back from somewhere in the bowels of the station.

"I called out. There will be a full rescue team sent come first light. But there is a lady who wants to talk to you. She seems very upset."

"Tell her to call back in the morning. I'm going to get some sleep." Duo finished his noodles and coffee in a couple of bites and a gulp.

"I don't think she wants to wait." Otto seemed a little hesitant. "The lady said if you tried to put her off to tell you that she's not waiting for your butt. She said to tell you Lady Une wants you now."

Duo sighed, "Shit! Une." He grimaced at Otto. "Lady Une is my commanding officer in Preventers. I better talk to her. If I don't, she'll have my nuts in a wringer." Otto gave him a disapproving look. "Sorry."

"You are much too young to be talking like that. Where . . . ah. I forget. You must be much older than you look."

Duo nodded. "Lots."

He spoke to Une who was, if not understanding, at least not in a temper. She got all the details and told Duo to deal with the locals as they were perfectly capable of handling it.

"When you get back, I'll have a few words for you."

"Just eat me out now. I feel bad enough as it is. Relena is out there with Heero. This whole thing sucks."

"Lady Relena is injured. You should have carried her out."

"Relena hurt? No. Heero fell off the face. Relena stayed with him. He's got a broken ankle. How did you get the idea she was hurt? Wha' . . . aaawww fuck . . . Une I'm tired. I gotta go out first light and retrieve Heero. And Relena. I'm going to bed."

Une sighed. "I don't speak very good German I was raised speaking English. The translator I have is electronic. I . . . it's midnight here. I'm going back to bed. You go to bed too. I want a report asap you understand me?"

"Yes. I understand. Have the clinic fired up. I'm going to have us all flown straight to Sanq. Night."

Duo wandered into the kitchen and was told that he could sleep in the rangers dormitory with the rangers. They provided him with sweats that weren't huge and pointed him to a shower. After showering and dressing, Duo made sure he knew what the arrangements were and went to sleep.

Xxxxx

Relena knuckled sleep out of her eyes. Heero was still sleeping, curled up on his side. Relena couldn't have resisted if her life depended on it.

"Heeeeroooo. Wake up. Hhheeeerrroooo!" her soft sing song. Brought Heero awake with a grunt and a flinch.

"Oh Heero. I'm sorry! Did you hurt yourself?"

"No. But that really gave me a start. Morning."

"Hungry?" Relena started digging into one of the packs. She'd taken the time to repack everything so that she could find things she wanted. "I can fix one of these yummy breakfast bars or there's . . . um . . . not sure what this is it says beverage powder. What's that?"

Heero decided not to tell her that he didn't like anyone else to fix his breakfast. The way he felt, it was going to be nice to be waited on.

"Who knows . . . it tastes like coffee, sort of. But there's cocoa mix in there somewhere. I'd rather have that if you can find it, Please."

Relena stuffed the beverage powder back into the pack and got out two packs of cocoa mix and a billy can.

"Heero. Why are billy cans flat?"

"They're flat so that they heat better. The heaters work better on flat objects. That's why entrees are in flat packs instead of round cans. They're easier to pack too . . . thanks."

Heero took the billy can of cocoa from Relena and let the heater do its work. Relena handed him a breakfast bar, then fixed her own breakfast.

"How long before Duo shows up, do you think?"

Heero looked at his watch. "Mmm . . . gray dawn . . . give him half an hour after true light. Maybe a little longer."

"How's your ankle? And your head." Relena reached out and stroked his face gently. She wished, not for the first time, that she'd gone about their relationship a great deal differently. He seemed to avoid her touch almost automatically.

Heero endured her touch this time, as he thought she was checking for fever.

Relena asked the question that Heero had never expected to hear from her. "Status: 01"

"Head ache; no confusion, no blurry or double vision. Ankle hurts, but that cast really helped. No fever, or at least minimal. Status: operational but impaired."

"Well, that's good. Lay back down and we'll wait for evac."

Heero lay on his back and watched the dawn brighten the tent Relena at his side.

"I thought the ranger said the winds got bad."

"We were lucky. The winds came up in the night. You slept right through them."

"Damnit Heero. You should have made me get up."

"Why? The tent is double staked. If it decided to blow away, you'd have been awake. Since it didn't, there wasn't any reason to wake you up."

"Pill."

"Hn."

Their conversation was interrupted by a shout from the rescue party.

Duo opened the door and tumbled in, reaching for Heero before he was all the way in.

He grabbed Heero in one arm and Relena with the other.

"Oh, man! Am I glad to see you two. You ok 'Ro? How's the head and the leg. Damnit. I . . . "

Relena hugged Duo and then pushed him into Heero's arms.

"I'll get out of here and start gathering our stuff. Don't take too long. 'K?"

Relena crawled out of the tent and into the hands of a medic, who insisted on checking her over. She patiently allowed him to take her pulse and check her blood pressure. She answered his questions and watched as the rescue crew gathered up their stuff and started unpitching the tent.

"Who drove these stakes? They're in so deep I think they're here permanently."

"Heero Yuy drives a stake, you need an extractor to get it out."

The man eyed the stakes and sighed. "Oh. Yuy drove them? We'll come back for them with a puller."

Relena found out that the team was from the local Preventer Office so she let them know who she was and found out that her identity was already known. It seemed that Une had had them discreetly followed from the time they left Sanq. She felt a little let down, but decided that it didn't make any difference. She'd only been trying to avoid the paparazzi.

"How do we do this? I don't know what to do. You'll have to tell me."

The agent turned with Relena to see Heero crawling out of the tent with Duo's help. "We'll carry you down to the . . . "

"You will not. I am perfectly capable of getting myself down this mountain under my own power. Heero is the one with the broken ankle and concussion."

"Agent Yuy? What the hell happened to him on vacation?"

"Der Tau-esser happened. I'm not sure exactly what. But his rope got cut during a rappel and he fell. We're lucky he didn't fall farther. Come on, let's go."

Relena dragged the agent to where Heero was still arguing with Duo over being carried to the extraction point. He wanted to hike a mile to the clearing where they'd been going to camp. It was the nearest place a chopper could land.

Duo was standing with another man, and several more were standing a short distance away with amused looks on their faces. Relena realized that most of these men had heard this argument before, perhaps several times.

"Heero, get on the stretcher. We're not moving a step with you on your feet."

Heero got an amazingly stubborn look on his face, a combination of sullen, stubborn and sulky. He looked like he wanted to strangle someone.

Relena took over easily and Heero found that Relena in queen mode was irresistible.

"Heero Yuy! Get on that damn stretcher! I'm not fucking around with you. And wipe that look off your face. Son of a bitch." Relena turned on the grinning men "and what the hell are you all smirking at. If you don't have something you're supposed to be doing, what are you here for. Get to it."

One of the agents worked up the nerve to remark "We'll all have something to do when Yuy gets of his high horse and on that stretcher. We're here to carry his highness to his chariot."

Heero growled, Duo sighed ,and Relena snapped. "Don't get cute with me. Get him on the damn stretcher and get us out of here."

Heero started to argue but Duo, finally tired of trying to reason with him, simply picked him up, lowered him into the basket-shaped stretcher and snarled "Don't be an ass. Lay down."

Heero gave up, his head still hurt and the idea of hiking a mile in mountainous terrain with a broken ankle wasn't very appealing.

"All right, I give. Stop nagging. In stereo yet. I'm down. Happy."

Relena smiled "Deliriously. Duo, we ready?"

Duo nodded and took hold of the stretcher by one of the middle handles. Five more men took handles and they started down the mountain, with Heero grumbling all the way.

Relena found her pack and shouldered it. She wanted it. For some reason it made her feel more secure. The agent who offered to carry it for her just gave her a short nod when she refused. She never realized the respect she earned by carrying that pack.

They reached the clearing and Duo stopped to speak to the local rescue guide who'd brought them in. After thanking him and making sure the pilot knew that they were to fly directly to Sanq Duo scrambled into the back with Heero and Relena.

"Lover this has got to stop. I can't take much more relaxation."

"Not my idea. I want to go to America and see all the national parks."

"Yeah Yosemite, Red Rocks, Mt. St. Helens. Don't shit me Yuy."

"No, I want to see Disney Land and Bushes Gardens and . . ."

Relena laughed over the sound of the rotors. "Those aren't National Parks. They're amusement parks."

"There's a difference?" Heero raised an eyebrow.

Relena sighed and they all succumbed to the mental let down of an ended mission. Relena realized now why Heero and Duo seemed depressed after a mission. The adrenalin let down was strange and depressing.

When they landed at the hospital in Sanq, Lady Une was waiting with a sour look on her face. She watched as Heero was unloaded with Duo right beside him on one side and Relena on the other.

"Lady Relena."

"Lady Une."

"You should go back to the Residence. I'll take over from here."

"No. I'll go with my friends. Heero will need Duo, and I need to see that he's ok."

"Very well."

Relena accompanied them to the emergency room and followed Duo into the examination room. Duo started giving the Doctor a run down of all the drugs he couldn't give Heero. The Doctor got snotty with Duo, who started to argue with the Doctor while Heero snarled and an orderly tried to get him to lie down.

"Excuse me . . . EXCUSE ME!" Relena sighed, ran her hand through her hair and whistled shrilly. "Shut the fuck up. Damnit."

Everyone in the room froze.

"Thank you." Relena turned to the Doctor "Do you know who I am?"

"Yes, Ma'am I know who you are." The Doctor eyed Relena with some trepidation hearing Relena Peace craft swear was unsettling to say the least.

"Now. Special Agent Maxwell is going to give you a run down of all the drugs you can't give Special Agent Yuy. You will listen to him. You will not give him, or me, shit. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"

The Doctor nodded, "yes, of course. The young gentle man is . . ."

"Special Agent Yuy. Gundam 01. You can't just go by the book with him, he's special. I demand that he be given the very best of care. He's my friend." Relena stuck her nose in the air and put every thing she had into the next sentence. "Both Agent Yuy and Agent Maxwell deserve the best, most special treatment they can get. You take care of both of them, or you'll answer to me personally. She turned to Duo. "You go fill out the paper work. I'll stay here to make sure that they don't follow standard procedures. There's nothing standard about either of you."

The Doctor twitched, then turned to start evaluating Heero. Duo looked at Heero and smiled, he took Heero's hand and whispered in his ear. "That's my girl."

Heero sighed. "And mine."

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the full lyrics of the song are:

**Bier her, Bier her**

Altes Studentenlied

Bier her, Bier her, oder ich fall um, juchhe!Bier her, Bier her, oder ich fall um!Soll das Bier im Keller liegenUnd ich hier die Ohnmacht kriegen?Bier her, Bier her, oder ich fall um!

Wein her, Wein her, oder ich fall um, juchhe!Wein her, Wein her, oder ich fall um!Soll der Wein im Keller liegenUnd ich Rheumatismus kriegen?Wein her, Wein her, oder ich fall um!

English translation

beer here, beer here,

Old student's song

Beer here, beer here, or I fall down, juchhe!

Beer here, beer here, or I fall down!

Should the beer lie in the cellar

And I get here the faint?

Beer here, beer here, or I fall down!

Wine here, wine here, or I fall down, juchhe!

Wine here, wine here, or I fall down!

Should the wine lie in the cellar

And I get Rheumatismus?

Wine here, wine here, or I fall down!

Extensive research, including visiting twenty web sites and a call to the local cave complex indicates that bats do not get caught in peoples hair. There is only one documented incidence in over fifty years. Good story, but it's another urban myth.

I don't quite like the ending, but I'm not sure how else to end it. It might be revised in the future. Read and Review. Review the ending especially. Thank you.


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